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Enough… Is how I feel I have had enough.. Enough of everything
I am off I’m going to move out as I need to get away from him and I need to make a happy place for my children and I need to get stronger. I can’t do any of this while under the same roof.
However I told him as didn’t want to dissappear his pretty much said OK but wants me to sign an agreement from his solicitor.
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Please don’t tell him any of your plans. You’re just giving him an advantage over you. Get away to a safe place then communicate through solicitors. Do not sign anything. You don’t need to. You don’t have to answer to him or include him in your plans. He will use everything you tell him against you. He doesn’t care about you or the kids or else he would move out. Don’t ever expect him to be reasonable or tell the truth. Never ever underestimate him. I made that mistake. There are no depths that they won’t sink to. Despicable nasty self centred. He has shown you his true colours, please believe him x
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Thank you ladies.. His OK has changed he was Fuming this morning and had a go at me saying I can not leave until I sign everything as though it was a divorce the plans for the children and financial. (detail removed by Moderator) He got really angry so I picked my phone up and said I was calling the police… He backed down and left.
I was a mess but after speaking to womens aid for an hour a lovely lady made me see clear again.
I am going I just need to get through the next week or so
If I don’t go I know he will break me down and will manipulate me every step of the way. I am so weak and scared. I know once I am away I can become stronger
I was trying to be reasonable and it’s back fired on me
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Hey cupcakes, don’t be hard on yourself. It took me a while for it to sink in that these men don’t want to be reasonable, they want everything they can grab to keep control of you, they will use finances, house, children. Remember FOG, Fear, Obligation and Guilt. There is not one reasonable bone in their bodies and you’re absolutely right about being better placed to deal with him from a distance. Bluff and lie your way through the next week if you have to knowing that you have an exit plan. They are pathalogical liars so don’t listen to a word he says. You are free to leave when you want to. It’s not upto him to give you permission. And an injunction? How rediculous. They just make it all up as they go along. I tried to reach an agreement, we even shook hands lol. My ex just kept changing the goal posts. He had no intention of being reasonable. Turns out I was entitled to far more through a divorce than he ever let on. Stay safe x ring the police if you need to. You can get advice on 101 from domestic abuse police.
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You are so right KIP what was I thinking being reasonable with this monster. I got more advice yesterday and I know deep down I’m doing the right thing I just feel so scared.
I am not signing anything before I go I’ve just got to be strong this week and keep out of his way
How do I tell my children I’m broken hearted for them
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You can do it. It’s great you are getting advice, it really helped me having the support of local DV service. You are doing what’s best for your kids, why are you broken hearted for them? Do you feel you are robbing them of their father? Mine are much happier since we split – he was bullying and manipulating them too!
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