I hardly keep my life together as it is because the only thing I have to think about is that my life isn’t better with out him but his is better with out me. That’s in my head all the time and then I’m reminded once a week when the kids him and see him, how much I’ve lost just by being me. For the rest of the time I try and function and try and make the kids have a nice life just so they don’t prefer him and his gf. I try to socialise so that i can feel like not everyone hates me but I always feel I’m begging people to be around me which then confirms more so that he was rite- it’s all my fault and I’m unlovable. So with all that going on- one little thing that doesn’t go to plan is enough to tip me over the edge. I know that it’s anxiety and I know I’ve always had it to a degree but medication is only going to numb the effects- it’s not going to solve all the problems. It won’t bring him back to me or make me loveable or give me a full family and amazing circle of friends