- This topic has 5 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 8 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
-
The more I find out about how much he lies the more I question our whole life together. Things I believed he told me I now very much doubt we’re true. The things his saying at the moment are showing his a compulsive lier. He can worm his way out of any situation and turn it round. Was everything all one big lie? I’m struggling remembering things and thinking he must have lied about them. I know I need to stop because it’s making me feel so low. I struggle with accepting who he is even now I’ve left him. I guess his showing his true colours now and I need to accept that my life was one big lie to him.
-
The life and love you set out to have with him was real. It was real for you. He may have been lying all the time or only some of the time, you will never know, but what you can always know though is how you felt and what you gave and experienced, he can never take that away from you x
I think many abusers will do any and everything to either make themselves out to be the victim or to spend an awful lot of energy proving to the world that this doesn’t bother them in the slightest – or a combination of the two. It’s very hurtful to experience. Remember also that you may view the past through clarity that you did not have at the time. Why would you have thought to question if he was lying or not? We are honest with them and presume they are honest with us as that’s what healthy and normal relationship are build on. You did nothing wrong here and no matter how little or how much he lied, you stayed true x -
I know exactly how you feel. It shakes us to the core. But try to remember you were sincere, you loved, you laughter and you have good memories. Lies or not on his end, you liked those times and they were good times. Just because he’s a compulsive liar has no reflection on you. I’d feel sorry for him that he has to live his life that way but you know you’re capable of true love. It gets easier as we process things. I think they’re con men. Many people are duped and hoodwinked. It’s just even more painful when it’s someone you thought loved you. Shame on him. We are everything without them, they’re nothing without us. Keep going x
-
It’s devastating Yellowflower, having what you thought was your life and future torn to shreds. Kip and AkwaysSorry, lovely words. I agree many people are duped. I was. Intelligent, successful, beautiful women all led a merry dance going nowhere. But yes, remember the good times and be safe in the knowledge that in Kip’s words (that will now be my mantra) we are everything without them, they’re nothing without us. Love it! You keep going and stay strong xx
-
Thank you girls for your words of encouragement and lovely replies. I am struggling to understand it all and I guess I never will. I honestly thought me leaving may just be the shock he neeeds to sort himself out. Instead he continues to lie and make up stories. I look back at things I believed weren’t true like him cheating on me when I had actual evidence and he still managed to. convince me it wasn’t true. I mean how on earth did I get to the point that he could make me believe it wasn’t and that everything that came out his mouth was the truth?! I guess I didn’t want to believe it myself it hurt too much. I was always the one to say sorry even when it wasn’t even my fault! How do they keep on getting away with it x
-
i think we get duped into believing what is real to them. theyre like actors playing a part and theyre like this with everyone. it sounds like its all sinking in now and thats for the best because it means youll accept whats happened eventually. im not quite there i still get frustrated with the whole situation and i still ask myself why? although i feel i understand the dynamics i dont think we will ever be on a level with them. to really understand their thinking. its when we stop trying we know were finally over this xxxx hope your ok yf love diymum
-
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
