Addiction

[Chocolatebunnie]

I have posted before about my husband and his addiction

I am unwell both with mental and physical health problems

He never cares or admits I have these problems and always claims he’s worse and ignores me. Or says I complain too often.

He didn’t help me a little while back with a health problem I had to go private and pay on my credit card.

Recently he has assisted me going private to obtain medication.

He is making me very uncomfortable as he is wanting to share this medication

I’m feeling it’s a difficult situation as this may help me, but he hasn’t done this for me it’s for him.

I’m even reluctant to try this medication as although it’s legal for me, it is not legal for him. I have very good reasons and had to prove to doctors many things to get it. I worry as I’ve had a terrible experience with him and his usage over years. I feel he’ll deny further his addiction. That im being hypercritical and enabling him. But I also feel pressured.

My children believe it’s a good thing for me. But also see that dad is firstly helping himself.

I’m worried I will be vulnerable both physically and emotionally. That where I have not drunk or taken drugs he will now have some righteous reasoning for his using as I will be too that it is going to make things worse.

[Lisa]

Hi Chocolatebunnie,

Sounds like a difficult situation to be in but please be mindful that the medication was prescribed for you and you only – and as you say, it wasn’t authorised easily. You are in need of that medication, not him; he is being selfish and manipulative by even suggesting it could be used by him as well.

Trust your instincts. You mentioned being worried this will only make you feel more vulnerable both physically and emotionally. This is very likely the outcome, as you are aware of how he little he genuinely seems to care about how your medical condition debilitates you.

Prioritise yourself in all this. If you need to talk this issue through further, as it is an extension of his abusive and controlling behaviour, it could be a good idea to call your local domestic abuse service and speak with a worker who will understand how you are feeling about it all.

Take care,

Lisa

[Hereforhelp]

Hey CB, I am so sorry that he is doing this with your medication… he may or may not know that it is illegal to share medication… if he is aware of that it concerns me that he will say that you gave it to him… idk, perhaps you could say something along the lines of you cannot share because it is illegal so he would need to seek help himself if he feels he needs the same medication.
It is also dismissive of the reasons why you need this medication and he should be supportive of you hopefully feeling better being on whichever meds habe been prescribed to help you.
You have done nothing wrong lovely, thus is all on him and him controlling what he can.

Keep posting, sorry I am not much help but I am thinking of you… we are all with you.
HFH ❤️

[browneyedmum]

Hey CB,

I know you’re prolly feeling especially vulnerable right now, but sharing your medication with him should be a hard no. xX.

[Chocolatebunnie]

I’ve just jumped on here quickly while I can.

Thank you for the replies.

I have an appointment with my support worker this week so it will be something to discuss with her.

As always boundaries and speaking up for myself are an issue and I can’t do this with him right now. He is using my medication as he has paid for it and he is being very kind and supportive, but this is not real I know. He knows it is prescribed and illegal to share it. He doesn’t care. It’s his as far as he’s concerned, he hasn’t said it but is taking it without asking.

He is pressuring me to use the medication too. I want to use it as I have been told too, he is using it to get a high.

I have on the plus side not felt this relaxed for years, I’ve tried so many therapies and meditation and so far it’s helped me.

It’s made me realise how stressed I am, to feel relaxed again it’s like I had forgotten how that felt.

I have actually slept well for the first time in years as I have insomnia and I have energy for the first time too as a result. So I’m hoping I may become more clear headed and less stressed and brain fogged, to be able to cope with everything.

I’m appreciating the nice spell with him especially as we have the hospital with one of the children coming up, it’s a big thing and we all need calm.

I know things aren’t right but I’m making the best of the situation just to get through for now.

Best wishes CB X

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