All clicking into place double life planned

[Mellow]

It’s all clicking the longer I have left he excluded me from other people .work friends and others in my community.he would say things like they have been insulting you behind your back so I would not speak to them.now I know it’s because they had potential to expose his double life and intentions.a lot of who my ex talks about are friends their are numerous women but I don’t know any of them not even by name.I’m now remembering events I’ve been to and people have acted wierd some ignoring me completely and talking to my partner only.
Another thing I’ve noticed is I got a few water infections and I wasn’t one to get these so now I’m thinking he was unfaithful sexually he has tried to tell me he has never had it with anyone else but now I don’t know if it’s true as these infections were on and off.i never said anything at the time but knew I was getting it from him.i really don’t know this man I’ve had children with and the sad reality is someone out their knows everything but because I’ve been excluded from his world I’m seen as the bad guy even some women I know he must know just stare at me like they know something.they look at me like a fool.I’ve got children with this man and lived in hell and it was all a lie he never loved me it’s all fake!the most awful thing me and my young child got into a conversation about dad and I told him about him sending lovey messages and he said to me you know mum he really dosent like you I know he dosent so I don’t know why he’s doing that he went on to say it repeatedly that he does not like me.this is a very young child if he can see that then I don’t know what to think.but he sees me and spends time with him so sees everything how long he on phone when I’m not there etc.so everything abusive I’ve got to point I don’t even want him to see them.i want sole custody but I’m already going through court for something else I can’t stress myself

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Mellow

Try to not be too hard on yourself here. He’s been cruel, and abusive, and thats different from you being a fool. To blame yourself for being a fool, is victim-blaming, you don’t deserve this. This is his responsibility, blame on him, and he’s treating many people very badly, abusively.

People in general get caught out by scammers every day, some lose hundreds of thousands of pounds to them, and thats because they’ve been believable and believed, and its only when our banks tell us about specific scams or we learn about them online that we become wise to the devious cunning and manipulations that we understand what to look out for. Its the same for DA.

Your child has seen the other side that you could not, it was hidden from you.

If you have concerns, as it seems to you, about him sleeping around and cheating on you, then I urge you to get STD testing to be sure you are healthy reproductively, and not carrying any hidden STI’s, but as fair as I am aware you wouldn’t get water infections from him sleeping around. Maybe if you get tested you could ask the practitioner about your water infections, as I’m not aware that they are sexually transmitted, but an STi would be proof of his infedelity/ies.

Stay strong, and protect yourselves.

warmest wishes

ts

[Starting-again]

When you feel strong enough I would urge you to go to the doctor and ask to be tested for Trichomoniasis.
My ex partner gave this to me and it got picked up on a smear test. I had been back and forth to the dr thinking I had a water infection, but it was this.
Take care of yourself xx

[Author]

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