Am I letting him down?

[Tenerifeseaoth]

Hey!

I’m feeling a little lost and unsure…

Am I a bad person and am I letting him down?

I’ve recently given a statement and evidence against him, not just for me but for someone else too.

Am I doing the right thing? He trusted me with this information and I’ve handed it over.

I feel guilty for doing it.

Is that normal?

I hope you are all ok!
Xx

[Lisa]

Hi Tenerifeseaoth,

Thank you for posting. It’s completely normal to have mixed feelings, its a massive step you have taken. You are not a bad person, you have every right to do this.

You are the most important person in this situation and your recovery from what you went through. When you doubt yourself just remember what brought you here and to the forum.

Take care and keep posting

Lisa

[Tenerifeseaoth]

Hi Lisa,

Thank you so much for your message. It means the world.

Take care,
X

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Tenerifeseaoth

I know how guilt inducing it is to do what feels like an absolute betrayal, but I came to realise the difference between loyalty and protecting a perpetrator, but the mix is a confusing one to work through, which is what makes it all the braver and tougher for you to have done. Its take strength and good boundaries to take that step in realising their harms need consequences.

You, as a normal person, feel guilt for what you see as breaking their confidence/trust, but they don’t care much for that do they considering what they’ve done?

You have done the right thing, its him thats in the wrong, and those who perpetrate crime will always run the risk that someone is going to report them for it, thats their life to live having committed these acts.

warmest wishes

ts

[Tenerifeseaoth]

Hi twisted sister,

That absolutely is it. Feeling like you have betrayed them for doing this and it can be and can get very heavy. It feels like those feelings are taking me backwards. The mix really is hard to work through but I’m trying.

As hard as it is to remember and go over, I keep trying to remind myself of the things he’s done in order to tell myself I’ve done the right thing.

You really are right.

Thank you. Your message has helped!

Xx

[Twisted Sister]

It can be super hard to hang onto an argument in your head, the reasons why this is the right thing, I think this is why so many find it helpful to write it down, or revisit their threads on here. I hope you can hang onto your positivity and keep it at the front of your mind always. x

[Eggshells]

Hi Tenerifeseaoth

The amazing TS has worked her usual magic and said some really important things which I can’t really add to.

He let himself down honey, when he did the wrong thing, repeatedly. You haven’t let him down. xx

[Tenerifeseaoth]

Thank you Eggshells.

Sending love xx

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