An abusers prayer

[HopeLifeJoy]

That didn’t happen.
And if it did, it wasn’t that bad.
And if it was, it’s not a big deal.
And if it is, it’s not my fault.
And if it was, I didn’t mean it.
And if I did…
You deserved it!

Denial, minimizing, deflecting, victim blaming, right?

Now let’s restore some justice:
That did happen!
It was that bad!
It is a huge deal!
It was his fault!
He did mean it!
You didn’t deserve it!

I’ve got the first paragraph from my favourite you-tuber. I added the second one to restore some justice ⚖️

[lover of no contact]

Excellent. So true. That’s very helpful to see it written like that!

[HopeLifeJoy]

Right, I found it simple yet powerful, describing their actions to the dot when they’re caught.

[HunkyDory]

Wow, yes. Thanks HLJ. Xx

[KIP.]

Very true and it shows the gaslighting that’s so confusing to us as victims. Why not just say ‘sorry’. x I don’t think I ever got a real apology. I got ‘I’m sorry it’s come to this’ and ‘i have to accept some of the blame’. I even got ‘I tried to tell you three or four times but YOU wouldn’t listen’ that last one was when I caught him with his trousers down. W*f. Delusional c**p. That’s why we should never engage.

[Author]

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