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I seem to be posting alot lately. So hes gone out tonight and I felt relieved because I could have a relaxing evening. But then the messages started. The main one being him saying that I had changed since getting back in touch with my family and that its their fault we’ve split up. I do agree that I’ve changed, I’ve become more myself and less his puppet. I just told him I wasn’t arguing and that me having a relationship with my family is my business. He then said he didn’t want our children seeing them. I’ve read alot about n********m and gas lighting but dont understand every aspect. Is this behaviour part of it? Because he tends to fit most of the criteria
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His behaviour fits with an abuser. He will constantly change the goal posts and keep your head spinning. Arguing with an abuser is like playing chess with a pidgin. Even when they lose they simply knock over the pieces, c**p on the board and strut around like they’ve won. His goal in life is to cause you misery and to be constantly in your head. To blame you to make himself feel better. To cause arguments and punish you for things you may or may not have done just to make himself feel better. Don’t waste your time trying to work out what he thinks because it won’t make sense to a normal empathetic human being. He will simply destroy you because he can. He’s taking up your energy and headspace that you should be using for your own wellbeing and building relationships with people who really care about you. Switch your phone off x or block his number x
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