Calling Women’s Aid ( what to expect)

[Anonymous]

Hello I have posted the other night on is it abuse forum and I’ve really received some amazing replies I can’t get over how kind you al are and patient. I’ve only started a new “ thread” cus I thought it more appropriate because I just wonder if i can ask simply when someone calls the women’s aid telephone line what to expect? As I’m extremely anxious in general anyway but this fills me with dread.. more specifically do they report you out of concern or can they ask questions to help start me talking as I know I’m awful
Out loud? I just know how irrational it sounds but iv hung up before it’s dialled a tone loads the last few nights as I don’t really know who else to phone/ next step of getting out of this whether that means leaving or maybe I’m in wrong etc ..

[maddog]

It’s unlikely that you will get through so I find it best to just leave a message with a name, number and safe time to call back. They are really good at calling back. Nobody is there to judge or report or criticise you. The helpline workers are trained and will understand where you are coming from. They will not tell you what to do.

[Tiffany]

Second the hard to get through thing. But they won’t report you. It’s a confidential service. They will just help talk you through your options. I am pretty sure that they didn’t even ask me for my address – just the region I lived in so they could give me information on local support available. If you know times when your abuser will be out and you can talk safely then leave a message with your name and safe times to return your call. If you can’t be sure then maybe try looking up your local branches opening hours. If you aren’t too rural it can be easier to get through to your local branch than the national helpline.

[Twisted Sister]

I hope you manage to call, and can get through or leave a message.

It’s very common to feel overwhelmed to make that call and also to not be able to speak, or cry. All these things are what the workers are familiar and very kind and accepting of.

I hope you can give them an opportunity to support you. I also second the difficulties in getting through.

They will never tell you what to do, this is your life and your choices which they will try to support and access to lots of services that could help also.

Warmest wishes ts x

[Anonymous]

Thank you , I will perhaps attempt tomorrow it’s just so hard as because he is self employed in various locations he can suddenly turn up like today up the road but not in a menacing way , just cus the job sent him there ..I guess I should be happy he would be back early … he dislikes me on phone until he knows who it is. I may look at if a local thing but then that would take the anonymity away and I’d spend nights panicking of all sorts. Thank you for the replies. Xx

[Lisa]

Hi Anonon,

I just wanted to add some information about the Helpline for you. The female support workers are all trained and experienced in talking to women who may find it very difficult to talk; so they will be patient and can ask questions to help you through the call if needbe. It will be taken completely at your pace. You will not be expected to reach any decisions or make any changes as a consequence of the call.

The calls are all confidential and you don’t have to give your name. You can take an ID number if you would like your anonymous information to be saved confidentially, so that if you call back you don’t have to start from the beginning. It is crucial that you try to find a time to speak when you are safe and the perpetrator is not nearby; perhaps you could call when you are out somewhere? If he does turn up when you are on phone you can hang up straight away.

There is more information about the calling the Helpline here.

We all understand that it’s a big step making that call, so take your time and do so whenever you feel able.

Kind Regards,

Lisa

[Dragonfly]

Hey Anonon. I would recommend speaking to WA. I called the first time and got through. I felt stupid calling for some reason then I lost my confidence and didn’t make much sense. The woman on the phone told me I could just drop in for a chat if I wanted to. So it took me a few days then I just went along, I spoke to a lovely lady who reassured me and more importantly validated me and answered a lot of questions. I was in there for ages. I’m so glad I went along.

They understand and will settle you. Don’t be afraid to speak to them x

[Author]

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