Child's anxiety

[citrine]

Hi

My daughter appears to suffering in anxiety. She is currently not seeing her dad. 1. Because she doesn’t want to and 2. Because he hasn’t asked recently.

She is scared of him. She is scared he will follow her and she is scared he will find out where we live.

She has difficulty sleeping and spends most nights in bed with me.

I have a GP appointment tomorrow but I’m currently have doubts whether to go. Will it open a can of worms? Or what can even anyone do. I just don’t know the answers anymore.

Thank you in advance

[White Rose]

Keep the appointment. If she’s with you and can’t talk for herself (too young/too shy/won’t) then agree what you’ll say on her behalf before you go in.
If she is of school age majority of schools now have some form of counselling available to them – primary and secondary schools. Ask and keep asking till she gets something to help.
Try to reassure her and try to get her into her own bed – thats the hard bit! I spent a few weeks seversl years ago battling with my primary school age child over this – I know now it was anxiety due to his abuse of her and also her fear for me as he’d told her he would hit me as well as her. More recently I spent several weeks on a mattress of the the floor in the bedroom of the same teenage child – again down to her fear of him even though we’d left. She kept seeing him heading for her ready to strangle her – not her imagination, she was reliving what he did at a time we were both too terrified to report it or to leave.
It will get better. Your child will settle, just give support, reassurance, stability and hugs and ask for help for her. Try to get a bedtime routine again with looking forward to things you might do, not back at whats happened xx

[citrine]

Thank you White rose. I’ll keep my appointment.

My daughter is secondary school age and like your daughter she also sleeps with me to protect me.

She tends to suffer in guilt too all related to her father. But I guess I’m exactly the same.

I’ll see the GP and see what she suggests. I did think about contacting the school so I’ll do this too.

Thank you x*x

[Author]

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