determined to get me into trouble

[ladiesand gentlemen]

My husband is SO determined to get me into trouble, he wants me out of the way so he can have the house and more importantly my Daughter
Every argument is my fault, every problem in the family is my fault, blames me even when it’s in black and white re an e mail or letter
He has resumed hurting himself so he can blame me and be seen as the victim, he will use anything to make a mark or scar on himself, yet is very careful not to mark my skin (these days)
I am trying SO hard to keep the peace and have things running smoothly, he now refuses to do any DIY or repairs causing more financial troubles having to employ others.
He wants to see me in big trouble(that will make him feel powerful)I have been extremely ill recently and have no more left to give, I am exhausted!!!!

[Lisa]

Hi ladiesandgentlemen,

This sounds completely exhausting, I’m sorry you’re living with this. An abuser will create ways to exhaust you to have further power and control, as I think you know. You are very strong trying to “keep the peace” but it’s an impossible task with his seriously abusive behaviour overriding everything you are trying to do. I hope you know that this is not your fault, he is entirely responsible.

Are you still in touch with your local service?

If you feel like you are in need of some additional support, you could chat to a Women’s Aid worker in confidence via our Live Chat service (open 10am-6pm every day). They won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you.

Kind Regards,

Lisa

[ladiesand gentlemen]

Thank you SO much Lisa
I am having to be VERY careful who I contact as he checks my laptop, I am also having to “Guard” the household paperwork as he keeps threatening to take all the money we use for bills, and to scrap my car as it currently needs repairs
I am getting stronger every day, long road to travel with my current health problems
I will keep ALL your advice in mind
Thank you once again, it means the world to know you are all there x*x

[Lisa]

Hi ladiesandgentlemen,

I understand its difficult to contact services when he is so controlling. There is some information on the women’s aid website about staying safe online: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/cover-your-tracks-online/

I hope you can access the support you need, keep posting to let us know how you are getting on

Best Wishes

Lisa

[ladiesand gentlemen]

Thank you SO much xx

[StrongLife]

Sorry this is happening- they do go to any lengths, Stalking,blaming, fault – it’s all bad.

Please keep safe at this time.

It is good you reached out – keep going.

[ladiesand gentlemen]

Thank you to all xx stay safe xx

[Author]

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