Divorce

[Put the kettle on]

Just wondering about people’s experiences divorcing their abusive husband? I just want to be free of him and get on with my life. I’m so nervous and scared

[Iwantmeback]

I do too but can’t bring myself to go for a divorce just yet. Logically speaking I know I need to, I think I’m just scared of the aftermath. I’ll wait till I’ve moved away before I push for one I think
IWMB 💞💞

[KIP.]

Do your research first. Visit some solicitors for some free initial advice. For me the separating part was very important. A legal separation date. The divorce is just a piece of paper at the end of the day but you need to have all your ducks in a row. Have a grip on what the law says your entitled to and get a good solicitor with experience who doesn’t let him mess you about. Get all the stuff like bank details pension details bank statement, debt, loans etc. Don’t waste your time trying to negotiate with him. Get yourself free and safe then tackle the divorce.

[Put the kettle on]

We’ve been living separate for a few months and we’re no contact. I just want to get on with it and have done. It’s stuff like what’s going to happen regarding our home. I think I’m extra stressed as I’ve started the process so on edge waiting for him to kick off.

[KIP.]

Stay no contact and let the solicitor deal with him or use a family member or friend as a go between. That way you’re protected from his further abuse. If he insists on direct contact then report him to the police. You have every right never to have direct contact with him again x

[Put the kettle on]

Thanks for your replies. I’m not used to saying no to him and standing up for myself so it’s going to be a process!

[Earlydays]

This is the next step for me too, but one I’ve been to worried to take. I saw a solicitor trained in domestic violence who explained that we don’t have to put too many details in just enough to let him know if he fights it we can add more stuff which he may not want coming out. She explained that it will take about 6 months for the process to be final so I’m just trying to gather myself together and then will start the process. Keep us posted on how you are getting on x

[KIP.]

You can stipulate that under no circumstances should he contact you directly. All correspondence should be done via solicitors. Then he cannot intimidate you. If he continues you can get a non molestation order. Don’t let him bully you. He can’t bully a solicitor x

[EbonyRaven]

I’m still saving up to afford to divorce him. Looking forward to the day I can start that process. Luckily there are no children and the property is wholly mine, so it’s a straight no claim divorce.

[Put the kettle on]

Thanks for your replies ladies, yes it’s a tough decision to make. I know there’s no going back to him but it doesn’t make it easier. I was married a long time and had expectations of our future together. I’m sure he’s going to do what he can to make me suffer as much as possible in any way he can

[Author]

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