Does he know or am I just hearing it now?

[Turnthelighsoff]

Had lots of comments my way the last few weeks.. along the lines off.. I’m off and giving off weird vibes so to speak. He’s (detail removed by moderator) apparently.. need to (detail removed by moderator)..

Does he know I’m planning on leaving?
He tends to say stuff similar to the above after we have our argument phase.. is it just that I’m hearing it now?

Running with so much anxiety all the time. Iv even had comments similar to well that denying me so that domestic abuse.

I started a new job a little while ago – I phoned in sick a few weeks back as I’m really struggling to learn the role. I feel pinned in on every Angle.

Got a trip away coming up with him and the kids. He’s going to be lovely and I just don’t know if I have that falseness in me to pretend everything’s okay.. I’m exhausted.

[Twisted Sister]

Hello Turnthelighsoff

I would say, yes, as they are very quick to pick up on any distance (in their world that will mean they are losing some control and power over you). This can make him escalate in his behaviours, because he cannot allow any loss of control or power.

Maybe chat excitedly about the holiday plans, even if you don’t mean it, if you think this might help dial down his intensity.

It only takes a slight change in tone, look, or action for them to notice any slipping. You have changed inside as you prepare to leave, so its vital that you keep safe however you need to for this last push to safety.

Do you have safety plans in place in the run up to leaving/leaving/left? It is exhausting to keep up the front, but hopefully it can be a short-lived effort just to know its vital to keep safe.

I wish you every strength for this final hurdle. Do keep talking and getting all the support you need as you need it.

warmest wishes

ts

[Turnthelighsoff]

Yes I’m in the process of making a plan. I have support from my local DA charity.

The playing pretend is just really wearing on me mentally at the moment. I know I want the end and I’m trying so hard to get myself there but I just can’t see it at the moment you know.

Thanks for listening twisted x

[Llgirl]

It’s probably best to get your non mol in ASAP, I feel that can keep you safe when you leave. It can take a week to come through, sending you so much strength, it’s tough but so much brighter on the other side xx

[nbumblebee]

I struggle when they are nice especially when you are going away you so look foward to a break and sometimes you see a glimmer if that man hou married the one you wish he always would be but it doesnt last and that horrible man is still there. The stronger we get tge worse tbey get as they are losing control they see it. Stick to your guns know you are walking towards freedom sweetie and keep walking
Stay safe xxcxx

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