DUMPING HUNDREDS OF PHOTOS

[KIP.]

I’d been putting this off till I felt stronger. Went through several large photo albums today. Dumped 99 percent of photos of him or with him but just couldn’t get rid of the ones of him holding our son when he was born. I’m having a clear out so have put the photos in a box but don’t know who will want to see them or why I’m bothering keeping them. I might go through them a second time and dump even more. Decades of family holidays and special occasions. What a waste. Old feelings of anger bubbling up. Need to stay strong and remember why we won’t ever be together. We all look happy in the photos. Then there’s one of me at a wedding and I remember he got drunk that night and I was going round begging people to stop buying him more drink. I must have come across as a real nagging wife. Spoiling his fun. I was so anxious because I knew what was coming later. What a way to live.

[Janedoeissad]

I think you keep them for now to remind you how far you have come.

It’s funny how pictures almost have two opposing interpretations for me now. There’s a picture of me and him which he loves. We are all smiles and look happy. I remember when that photo was taken he had been screaming at me not more than 10 minutes prior. My smile is forced. I hate that photo. Yet it is currently proudly displayed in our house.

Well done for going through them all and processing those memories. Mine are mostly digital and will be deleted in bulk.

[Ayanna]

This shows that you are much stronger.

I still have all the photos. I remember every story behind my smiles and it breaks my heart every time when I look at them. But I cannot delete them or bin them. I wish I was strong enough to do that.

[Dragonfly]

I think it’s a good thing Kip to clear out the photos. If you’re unsure about some then that’s your gut telling you not to ditch those one’s. It doesn’t all have to be done in one day x

[KIP.]

Thanks for all your support. I didn’t realise how much stronger I’d become. Just looking at photos early on would cause huge triggers. Onwards and upwards x

[Serenity]

Well done, KIP. The fact you could throw them away shows that your feelings for him were truly killed off by his treatment of you. Same here. I felt nothing when I heard he was with another woman.

I suppose the photo of him with your child as a baby is hard to bin: we have such hopes for our partners when we have babies. We imagine they will love them as we do. We think that having kids will be the making of them.

I am so glad that you have managed to get away from him and that you have done all you have to expose him. They never deserved our faith and hope. But you have earned your peace and quiet.

[KIP.]

Thanks Serenity. Not only have Ive had to fight for and earned my peace n quiet but I’ve actually managed to give him some real frights back. And boy did it feel good. Taking back the power x

[Missssy]

Absolutely well done KIP – it’s a testament to your strength that you have been able to get rid of photographs – you should be proud of yourself and know how far you have come on your journey 🤗 I have not deleted anything I can’t seem to bring myself to, I guess I’m not there yet.

You are all so strong and brave and I hope you ladies recognise that. X

[Confused123]

well done hun, just shows u r ready to move on, when i relocated i threw my wedding outfit, wedding album and engament photos after looking at them one time and swearing for wasting so much of my life, it felt such a relief as threw into waste bin at waste site, photos of us and kids on holidays and b day i just put all in box and stored in loft, we dont need the pic close by to remind us . u doing so well

[Dragonfly]

Confused 123….you just gave me a flashback – a good one lol. I shredded, ripped and cut my wedding dress. I was going to transfrorm it into a nice top but the scissors just took over. Very therapeutic 😂

[Serenity]

I recently dumped my wedding dress. Bad move, bad memories, good riddance!

[bunsandcakes]

WELL DONE!!! That was a super brave move. You have been the toughest voice for me on here. Always what you suggested I do I thought ‘wow thats a tough stance’ but every single time you were right. Ive wanted to tell you that for ages KIP, I hope you see this. You said ‘leave’, you said ‘log it’, you said ‘go to court’ you were right with it all and it all played out exactly as you said. Your tough voice resinated with me. Here, you have been tough again. You knew you needed to do it and you procrastinated as you knew it would stir up emotions but.. now its done. You have freed yourself of another tiny thread of burden left by that horrible horrible time. It’s done now. Well done. xxxxxx

[Author]

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