- This topic has 6 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 1 month ago by
polo.
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14th March 2019 at 10:35 am #74141
polo
ParticipantCan anyone here give me some advice ? I am (detail removed by moderator) years out of a (detail removed by moderator) abusive relationship / marriage. I left the family home with the children to build a new life for us away from his abuse / controlling behaviour.
I was put at high risk by the police in (detail removed by moderator) just before I left due to the level of controlling behaviour.
I am now going through the financial part of the divorce and am faced with having to hand over every single aspect of my personal life and work life including names of my landlord, (detail removed by moderator) etc etc
Is there any way I can ask the courts to allow me to withhold information I feel would be hugely dangerous or a least detrital to mine and the children safety / happiness should he obtain it ?
my solicitor says it is best to give full disclosure to show we have nothing to hide but I having nightmares over the whole situation 🙁
Thank you
Polo
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14th March 2019 at 2:14 pm #74150
maddog
ParticipantI’m sure you don’t have to hand over details that would endanger you. Is your solicitor a specialist in domestic abuse? Have you tried calling Rights of Women? It’s difficult to get through, but worth the effort when you succeed. Citizen’s Advice may also be able to help you.
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14th March 2019 at 2:28 pm #74151
polo
ParticipantHi Maddog
thank you for your reply. my solicitor is a family law solicitor and very good but sometimes I feel she is not seeing the bigger picture here and he is blatantly using the court system to find out all the information he has so badly wanted to know for the last (detail removed by moderator) years. It has taken so much out of me to survive on my own I feel if I let him have this information it would put me back to square one and give him back the control I took so long to escape from. I would not put it past him to try to get me kicked out of my home and lose my reputation (detail removed by moderator).
(Detail removed by moderator).
He is so manipulative and yet charming I feel my fears are not being taken seriously.
I will try calling ROW and also CA Thank you x
Polo
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14th March 2019 at 4:39 pm #74161
KIP.
ParticipantChange your solicitor. I had to change my first one. She was useless and put me in danger. Get your new one to redact every single piece of personal information. He doesn’t have to see that. Stand your ground. If it ever goes in front of a judge, you have enough evidence already to back up your concerns. Have faith in yourself and don’t be bullied into handing over anything you do not want to. Get your local women’s aid involved and see if they can recommend a good solicitor x
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14th March 2019 at 6:47 pm #74168
diymum@1
ParticipantI agree with above, start as you mean to go on -your terrified of him therefore your terrified gets your address or any other personal details. (detail removed by moderator)xx
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14th March 2019 at 9:49 pm #74193
EbonyRaven
ParticipantAs this is the (detail removed by moderator) there is a form you can complete with details you want kept secure, for example address, telephone number, place of work etc. It is submitted with all the other papers.
This means the court has all the information they need, but those details are not shown or given to the other party.
Your solicitor should be aware of this.
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15th March 2019 at 7:19 am #74204
polo
ParticipantThank you all for your replies. I will have another word with my Solicitor to let her know my findings and concerns xx
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