Feeling so down

[soconfused2]

I’m having a bad day (well a bad few days really). I’m in the process of divorcing. I thought I had things straight in my head that there was emotional abuse, but now i’m back to thinking it was me, i’m a bully like he told me and that he’s right he would have loved me if I’d treated him with more respect, that I am a bad mum.

I should have been better. I should have tried harder. But now he’s won’t talk to me, even to confirm if he wants to divorce or not. I feel so stuck. I wish I had been better but now its too late.

I just wish this wasn’t my life. I don’t want to ruin my children’s lives. I can’t imagine ever feeling better, just lonely and sad forever. Not really sure what the point of this post is. Just looking for some support I suppose. Thanks for reading.

[Bananaboat]

Big hugs. All of those emotions are normal but I highly doubt you’ve made a mistake! Even now he’s punishing and controlling you, making you doubt yourself and using the kids as weapons. In non-abusive divorces, yes there are high emotions but they don’t resort to being petulant children and wholeheartedly blaming you. Remind yourself of the bad times. Be kind to yourself, yes it’s good to be away from abuse but it’s still a break up with all those stages & emotions. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day xx

[Nextchapter]

I feel I’m the same boat, it’s incredibly hard. Taking the talking away is controlling again… it’s incredible to think people treat others with such disrespect. Sending you lots of support and love X

[Author]

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