feelings

[Worrywart]

Hi Ladies, i’m having these thoughts now …like why couldn’t he love me like i loved him, i keep expecting him to walk through my front door, but i know he wont, i feel down again 🙁 why am i left with all this c*** when he gets to walk away scott free, i guess its the roller coaster of emotion im feeling …i keep re living when we used to split up before like if i go somewhere like my local chippy i’d remember that he would either be waiting at home or he would start msg me to worm his way back in …i guess this is normal its like i cant except he has definetly gone this time …god i hate this 🙁

[Lisa]

Hi Worrywart,

I’m sorry to hear how you’re feeling. It sounds like so many memories and emotions are coming up, now your mind has the space to allow them to. This is completely normal. You might find it helpful to write your feelings down. If you haven’t done so already you could ask your local domestic abuse service or your GP how you can access some counselling, ideally with a counsellor who has a strong understanding of domestic abuse and trauma. Talking with a therapist might help you to process some of your thoughts.

Kind regards and keep posting,

Lisa

[fizzylem]

Hey WW, yes it’s a huge adjustment to make, I think as we remove the lens and see more so what he did to us than ever before, it’s a hard pill to swallow for sure, but needed. This will pass hunny, you’re clearly still needing to make sense of what happened atm.

The fact you were able to love him and were prepared to try and make a go of things, with all the flaws he posseses, tells me you are a kind, compassionate human being – you have a big heart and struggled with the ending for so many reasons. Quite simply, you want to love. He however doesnt want to love, he wants to be loved only – doesn’t work hey.

I really do hope you find a peaceful life because you really do deserve this, you certainly did not deserve to be treated the way you have been. No more now though hey, nor ever again in the future. Try to work out what this whole sorry affair has taught you – as this is the way out of the emotional turmoil x

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Worrywart

I just to say what your brain is doing is completely normal, and no only that, but healthy, although yes it is a very trying part of processing your separation from him.

You go through a period of processing like this before it starts to settle down and you come to conclusions in your mind and then it stops.

So, today its like this, and very likely tomorrow, next week/month, but it will settle and is a healthy part of starting recovery.

Warmest wishes

TS

[Worrywart]

thank you ladies x

[Author]

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