Finding men pathetic

[Finallysomethingclicked]

Hi just wondering if this is a normal part of recovery?-

I’ve been getting some unwanted attention lately and have coped well with it and on the most part men seem to get the message I’m not interested

Then this one Man through Facebook started commenting etc on my posts,at first it was harmless and then the warning signs- or is it just me?? He started little things like calling me miss instead of my name I politely said my name is x and he made a joke of it but started to use my name then started asking inappropriate things like wanting a recent picture and just acting pathetic etc etc I told him to leave me alone and blocked him.

I have male colleagues and friends and don’t feel threatened by them but this one person to me was a potential abuser or am I just being too sensitive and judging people too quickly? I really feel on edge about his behaviour

Fsc x

[Ladyglittersparkles]

I think once out of a relationship you can feel isolated and lonely. After such volatile atmosphere things can seem eerily quiet.
I’d say be guarded. Steer clear of forming bonds with any men till your stronger and ready.
Stick to your friends and family. You thought he seemed a jerk so you backed off. No problem with that. Its your life and you get to decide who’s a jerk or not! Trust your instincts
X

[SunshineRainflower]

I think you were right to block him, the behaviour sounds creepy. I know what you mean about unwanted attention I feel like I attract a lot of creeps and the good healthy men aren’t interested in me, I am hoping that when I heal I start attracting the good ones and repelling the bad ones!

I have read a lot recently about how as women we always feel we need to be polite, and that this can often end badly when we are polite to the wrong people and they then violate our boundaries.

The other day I was in a cafe when two men came in and asked to share my table. It was a large table in a small cafe so I said no problem, but then they started talking to me, asking what I was reading, then they were creeping over the waitress who was about 30 years younger than them. I instantly disliked them and decided that I didn’t need to be polite as they were creeps, so I when they tried to talk to me I said something which basically gave them the hint to back off, they left me alone and I walked out without giving them a second glance.

Don’t feel the need to be polite to these weirdos, you don’t owe them anything. Go with your gut, if behaviour makes you feel uncomfortable then block them/walk away. When you are getting positive respectful attention from a man you will know the difference but maybe read up on abusive men to know the warning signs to help you feel more sure of what is potentially abusive and what is healthy if you haven’t already.

[Finallysomethingclicked]

Thank you for your replies I just thought I was overreacting but I’m not he went through my pictures conversations etc I don’t use Facebook a lot as I wasn’t allowed before,I have now clamped down on who can view me and contact me. Just unnerving how long has he been looking through my page etc feel a bit stupid I allowed anyone that access but lesson learned. There wasn’t anything on there bad just don’t like how he made me feel vulnerable when I have been doing so well. A year ago I didn’t know anything about abuse and dv now I’m so wary my eyes are wide open and I see it so much it’s scary but I’m grateful I know what to steer clear of now

Thank you ❤️

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