First meeting with outreach worker

[citrine]

I finally contacted my local women’s aid and I’m meeting with an outreach worker next week.

I’m scared now that things will be come real. What type of questions will she ask me? Will it be recorded that I’ve seen her? What if I change my mind and can’t face leaving.

This is all so hard. Why does it even have to be like this.

Any help greatly appreciated.
X*x

[Confused123]

Hey HUn

Dont panic, these ladies r really there to listen to u and help u, yes they will make notes but to guide u, they wont put pressure on u to make decision, the choice will be yours , they can only support u and offer u support, sometimes hearing what our situation is written down and read to us can be real eye opener, i know it was for me

[Racoon]

I’m quite sure you’ll find it to be a positive experience. Try and see it as a chat with a friend. You are not committing to anything and you will not be pushed into anything. You can say as much or as little as you want. Many survivors I have spoken to find it such a relief to speak about their situation to someone confidentially that actually really understands the complexities of an abusive relationship. They will not judge you in any way but will be able to suggest a way forward for you based on your personal circumstances. I’m sure you will come away from the meeting with a bit of a weight off your shoulders looking forward to the next one.

Well done for contacting women’s aid and arranging the meeting. Take your time and move at your own pace. It’s not a sprint to the finish line.

Please let us know how it went if your able to.

Hugs xx

[Falling Skys]

Hi Citrine

When I met my outreach worker for the first time I was scared didn’t know what to expect. They have a few questions that they will ask, including assessing if you are at risk.

It was the best thing I did getting one, she help me gain confidence. She will support you with what ever you want to do. I used mine for a sounding board,we don’t meet any more but if I have uses I still have her phone number.

Good luck.

FS xx

[citrine]

Thank you ladies for your replies. I’m feeling more positive about it now.

I think one of my main concerns is would the outreach worker contact social services. The abuse (when it occurs and it’s mostly now silent treatment) is only ever directed at me and he spends very little time with our children and I would never let them be at risk. I know I’ve read that if the outreach worker believes a child is at risk then they will refer to social services but what is deemed as “at risk”?

I know I’m probably panicking but that’s me.

Thank you ladies again x*x

[Liquorice]

Hi citrine….this is a constant worry of mine too…ive managed to finally call the helpline but then i just hungup 😕…well done for actually reaching out hope it all goes really well for you…keep us posted, goodluck xx

[citrine]

Hi Liquorice.

I hung up a few times too. It is a big fear of my this “social services” thing.

I may cancel yet and just do it “my way”. I know what I have to do/want to do. I just need to do it.

Lots of love xxxx

[Liquorice]

Awww try not to cancel hun, although i have to agree we get by for so long on our own the theory ” my way is working” does seem easier, but youve done so well coming this far please just give it a go and see what you think, hopefully it will only help xx

[Racoon]

Discuss your concerns about social services with outreach worker at the start of the meeting. She will be honest with you. I am sure social services would only be informed if the children were at immediate risk of direct harm. Women’s aid are exceptionally aware of the things that could put survivors at more risk. E.g. Unnecessarily involving social services. This would also betray your trust in them and make it less likely that you are able to escape your current situation. They really are there to support you with your choices and increase your options. They will not even encourage you to leave.
I really hope you are able to make the meeting.

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