Help!!! Pls

[Merlin22]

So just ready to give up can’t take this anymore
So We (children and I) took the leap over (detail removed by Moderator) ago and left my husband and everything has been ok
He could only manage to have contact with children (detail removed by Moderator) evenings a week and alternate weekends and that has been working excepted his pick up times are all over the place for collection and they would leave and I would be left panicking till they came home.
He has (detail removed by Moderator) comming up with children which was sorted at very beginning of this process
But then he was demanding them to spend (detail removed by Moderator) with his mum and (detail removed by Moderator) days with his dad and stepmom and I said that time with them was to be in his time.
Then my worst nightmare one night when seeing there dad he returned one of children and other has gone with him.
It’s now been (detail removed by Moderator)
And every path seems to lead back to same place and if do court route my child may say wants to live him but they (parented and his mother) are buying him and started talking to him about whole process long before it had even happened ( partner and I separated)
Really just feel just not getting out of bed and not putting one foot in front of another as I he(partner)has said it will be (detail removed by Moderator) weeks he staying there

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Merlin22

I can understand your feelings of despair in your situation. You did well to get yourself and your children away from him. Unfortunately, abuse doesn’t stop and I am sad to hear of what has been happening to you all since the separation.

I would alert services and explain that the child may be in distress if you think this is the case, but certainly that the childis not safe with the father because you fled due to the abuse to keep you all safe.

Alert teachers also, although its not school at the moment, but other groups that they go to, just so that they can keep a look out for any other behaviours or upsets from them.

Once the awfulness of what he’s done has been processed you will feel more able to fight this, you could alert police also. I doubt they will be able to do anything though, other than perhaps a visit to check on the well-being of the child.

This also puts the other, returned, child into an upsetting place having been ‘rejected’ and the sibling the ‘chosen’ one. Its a terrible way to treat children, and hopefully they will be able to both see what he’s doing. It will certainly be feeling very strange and uncertain for your child to not be returned home with their sibling, they will no doubt be missing their mum, and even possibly feeling they are doing something wrong in staying there, it will be very complex for them also.

Do keep talking and letting us know how you get on, it will help you to process all this, and perhaps help you to make some decisions and act in various ways to involve others to support and help.

warmest wishes

ts

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