- This topic has 10 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 11 months ago by
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He left I’m glad I weirdly don’t feel anything even when I was upset he’d always ask if I’d miss him I don’t if I do it’s just a little I feel like I can do what I want without him telling me no I don’t have to worry if the housework is done or not I can do it when I want .i will still have a tidy home but I won’t have to think of the insults if it’s not to his liking I just feel good that I’m not being disrespected all the phone calls to other woman whilst I’m in the room .all the talking another language so I don’t understand.filming me being upset.gaslighting me constantly ignoring questions being told everything is none of my business and everything is his money .watching him charge his phone upside down because he’s deceitful I’m free already the lines on my face are less . I can see more clearly how toxic it was
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I am relieved I feel like I can be me !I don’t have to beg for change as he was stuck in his ways! it’s some of the little things that I was never allowed to do or only allowed when he went away when he come back he would put everything how he wanted.i was only ever allowed to do something if he got something out of it.and even then it wouldn’t last .there even when I think he knew what he was doing wasn’t right he would still tell me to leave it like the furniture purposely stuck out and not being allowed to put it in place when everyone who visited could see it didn’t look right the way it was stuck out .even all the kids have noticed that how it was before should not have been like that it was like I was made to put things a certain way on purpose to annoy me
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Thanks ladies the abuse was getting bad towards the end and I really felt like a used doll especially the sexual stuff you can probably see.he has been in touch but only the children and he still has access to the home I’m hoping he dosent let himself in.I’m not going back I’ve had a taste of freedom and I won’t let it go all the things I’ve wanted to do I can now without worry and I’ve got so many I will have limits cause of the children but I’ve limited contact and only using small answers .it seems he has noticed what he’s missing but I don’t care and I feel it’s the best way to be act like you don’t care.still got some hurdles but hopefully be fine this week will be a challenge as I’ve got a big event coming which he will be there I can’t avoid it
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You’ve no idea mellow how relieved I am to hear that, i so desperately wanted there to be a way you could separate from him quickly cos of what he was doing to you and how toxic it was for you being in that enclosed space all the time with no escape, has he gone for good? I really hope so, also filming you upset is sadism (he could’ve had psychopathic traits to enjoy doing that to you it’s evil) you’ve got your freedom back I’m so glad
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When I think back it’s disgusting he was on phone to a lady while he did it I was getting upset he was talking to her and he was filming and laughing.probably a flying monkey I’m not sure what you would call that situation.but he sometimes would try record me in arguments too.he’s gone for good in my eyes anyway he’s not in the home so I’m good I felt like a used doll kept waking me up for sexual contact then talking to another woman 5 minutes later he started showing his true colour more and more cause he knew I wanted it over with I felt like he was trying to torture me towards the end.he still has every excuse in the book though .but there’s too much suspicion even when I’m thinking these lies could be a good enough answer I remember another thing which can’t be excused
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He was a dark disgusting abuser mellow and I’m sorry you ever met him, recording you angry is a bait and switch tactic where they get you angry (sometimes record it) as a manipulation tactic to try and make out to people how out of control and abusive you are to discredit you in future to other people/certain authorities. Flying monkeys are acquaintances or families of the abuser who are either sided with the abuser to gain information from you (to get back to the abuser) or someone empathetic either connected to the abuser (or you) to also give information to the abuser about you thinking they are being helpful or not really understanding the full extent of the situation between you (abusers manipulate and lie to “everyone” around them) just so you know so you can be more on guard (still so glad he’s gone) 💗💕💗
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Wow this is amazing news mellow i am so happy for you I really am.
To be free to not have that constant fear that knot in your tummy to be able to just be you gosh how incredable.
Remain strong sweetie make sure you have or get a good support network around you now, keep talking keep understanding and keep believing in you.
This is now time to heal to find who you are and to Love her again. Sending you hugs sweetie big happy ones xxxxx
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