He’s saying I assaulted him

[Pinkypanther]

Ok so this might be a bit long and hard to follow but I’ll try my best to make it understandable. Ha
So we have a dog, he has now decided it’s his dog although he cannot take her to his (detail removed by Moderator), he has informed me that I am not allowed to take her for a walk without first getting his permission, well I’m not doing that I’m trying to have no contact other than to discuss our children and contact with them ext. My dog is old and if she gets walked to far she struggles walking for a few days as her back end goes stiff and sore, I have a big garden she runs round so me not walking her isn’t a massive deal…. He is using this though as an excuse to be at the house to take her for a walk. He came (detail removed by Moderator) picked her up and left….

My house is in joint names with him and I can’t get it removed without him agreeing tho I am trying with help from a local domestic abuse service and my solicitor, he wants me to sign the house over to him, says I can live there and still pay the bills ext untill I find somewhere else, at one point he badgered me so much I sort of agreed In a way, I said I would sign the papers and give them to the solicitor to then pass on when I find somewhere. I don’t want to move and shouldn’t have to, he ha never paid a single bill or anything. I love that house and have now become good friends with the neighbors.

So anyway it was getting late and he hadn’t brought the dog home so I messaged asking if he was bringing her home and that I would prefer for him not to be at the property after (detail removed by Moderator) I wanted a shower and hasn’t eaten, if I was eating when he got there all I would get was oh it’s nice you can afford to eat bla bla bla trying to make me feel bad.
So he replied telling me that (detail removed by Moderator)… This was the last straw so I told him I’m never signing the house over to him.

When he finally got back with the dog, he started on me about signing the house over, then hold me I could buy him out for (detail removed by Moderator) then said I have to sign it over. When he realized this was not going to work he asked for his bank card back, he has a bank he has never used and I was using it for saving money, luckily I had a feeling he would do something like that so I emptied the account. He tried to log into his bank and it sent the code to my phone, he asked for my phone to get the code.. I went to read the code out and he went to grab my phone so I locked it. He started on at me saying I wasn’t allowing him access to his bank and I had to give him my phone, I handed my phone over as I changed my code so he cannot get into it anymore, he tried my old code over and over and said (detail removed by Moderator) so I went to grab my phone he moved I tried again and accidentally scratched his (detail removed by Moderator), I didn’t manage to get it so had to try again this time I got it but apparently scratched (detail removed by Moderator) as well.
He then goes on at me that I assaulted him, kept asking why I assaulted him, eventually I said . During this I kept (detail removed by Moderator) asking him to leave … Once I said that he said I’ll leave now I have recorded you amitting to assaulting me. I pretty much pushed him out the door and said (detail removed by Moderator).
He then left he sent me a message but nothing since
My neighbor heard from her window.. I got a message asking if I was ok, I said I would be, she then replied…good on you I’m so proud of you was really good hearing you standing up for yourself.

So now I have apparently assaulted him and he’s recorded my admitting to it, who knows if he will contact the police, the social workers or the housing assosiation. Whatever he does I’m ready for it.
It’s at times like this I’m glad my children haven’t been returned to my care yet. That might sound horrid but I need everything to be ok for them to come back and the social worker and courts won’t let them come back if it’s not.

Sorry I rambled on a bit and not sure if that makes sense atall ha xx

[KIP.]

You need to go absolutely zero contact. It’s not his dog and he has no right to see it. It’s simply another excuse to have contact with you and to mess you around. Abusers are liars and any contact you allow he will use to manipulate and hurt you and there’s also nothing stopping him reporting you to the police for assaulting him, even though you didn’t it’s more pain he can cause and an assault investigation will not help get your children back. The key is absolutely zero contact and apply for an occupation order or non molestation order to protect yourself and to keep him out of the home. Cut every tie you have with him. Any bank accounts and mobile phone contracts any household bills get into your name. If he continues to contact you then report him to the police. Keep all his messages and a journal for evidence.

[Pinkypanther]

Thank you for your reply. I’m actually seeing my solicitor about it all on (detail removed by Moderator) xx

[KIP.]

Well done. You need some legal protection from him but know that he will use anything he can to regain control and when he can’t regain control that’s when he will get violent and you won’t see it coming. My ex had me arrested by lying to the police. Made up such nonsense but it was still awful having the police come to my home. If you have contact he can allege anything x

[Anonymous]

Pinky panther, I completely agree with KIP. No contact. No access to dog or house. The dog is an excuse. If it was not the dog it would be something else. Block him totally. Only contact through solicitor. Men like this can manipulate and try to turn any situation to their advantage. Any ongoing issues between the two of you could adversely affect the timing of your children coming back to you. Keep him totally out for yourself and also so you can show Social Services that your home is a safe place for your children to return to. Good luck, you can do it.

[Author]

Posts