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    • #148545
      Thewhiterabbit
      Participant

      Hi , I’m white rabbit , I got lost down the rabbit hole of abuse (removed by Moderator) years ago and got out (removed by Moderator) years ago however I’m still being abused silently infront of courts and judges and no one sees. I was let down by everyone in the system and wasn’t even given victim support until 2 years later at which point I told them not to bother. I’ve done it all by myself with my children and I’m honestly so much stronger then I was before but it’s been a hard road and I don’t know how I’ve managed to survive. I’m hoping this forum might help. Or I may help others whilst here . Much love to you all may you become warriors and the universe be on your side

    • #148591
      Eggshells
      Participant

      Hi Thewhiterabbit

      Welcome to the forum.

      I’m sorry to hear that you are still having such a hard time. There seems to be a lot of lip service paid to helping victims of domestic abuse but it isn’t being backed up with enough positive action. There is still a mountain to be climbed in raising awareness of what abuse actually is and how the legal system promotes it. I get the impression that alot of the professionals who are supposed to deal with abuse have never had any training on it.

      It sounds like you have been really strong. I hope the forum is able to share the load with you a little. xx

    • #148592
      Hereforhelp
      Participant

      Hi whiterabbit, it sounds like to have had to dig deep and move forward without support, that takes a lot of strength. It is a minefield re DA help/support as so many professionals do let us down on this journey.

      I am sorry that your ex’s abuse continues, it baffles me how they keep getting away with so much whilst we, the survivors, deal with all the aftermath.

      Welcome ❤

    • #148597
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Hi Whiterabbit,

      I’ve just joined the forum and like you feel let down by people/agencies that should be looking out for our best interests however I feel the onus is on us to avoid the perpetrator and there are no real consequences for their actions. I also feel some agencies do not recognise the long term impacts of abuse. I have lately seen my abuser (after (detail removed by Moderator)) and it brings back all those feelings and I’m back in the state of not eating or sleeping, back to being hyper vigilant and living on adrenaline. I totally understand where you are coming from and sympathise with the lack of support you have received.

    • #148658
      Thewhiterabbit
      Participant

      Thankyou for all your support , I think the worst part is no one listens because somehow abusers normally have the gift of the gab and rewrite their past and truly believe it no one seems to see past the initial fake profile they build . It’s the denial that gets me , now I’m strong through fighting but before I truly thought that maybe I was just crazy and had made it all up because no one believed or listened to me at every point . I broke down but I’m building myself up luckily I have a great partner now that understands and supports me

    • #148683
      Lisa
      Main Moderator

      I’m sad and angry on all your behalf that you’ve felt so let down and unheard. You’re right that there’s still progress to be made in some professionals’ and wider society’s understanding of and response to domestic abuse. Even so, we should all be able to expect better when reaching out for support. You should always expect to be believed and respected. As we read on this forum about some women’s experiences, it can make such a huge difference when appropriate support is forthcoming.

      Take care and keep posting,
      Lisa

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