His family hates me because I reported

[Chocs]

I’ve always had such a lovely relationship with my previous partner’s family. We shared our culture with each other and openly said that we love and care for each other. I received the shock of my life recently. His mom is the only other eye witness of the abuse. She would see him (detail removed by moderator). She knew he had unpredictable outbursts of anger. It is for this reason that i thought that she would understand me reporting my ex partner (especially for stalking) as she was there and saw him hurt me sometimes. I could not believe my eyes when she started begging me over text to cancel the investigation. It was a stab to the gut. When i told her that that’s not possible she went on to ask me to tell her exactly what i told the police. Of course i didn’t tell her but that’s so odd to ask me? As if you hadn’t seen some of what he did to me?

I was feeling emotional the night he got arrested and I was thinking hard about canceling the investigation. I just messaged her asking “(quote removed by Moderator)”. She then blocked me. I felt horrible. I tried messaging her daughter instead just to hear anything and her daughter as well blocked me.

 

At that point i felt like i just wanted to die. I was so close with this family. I called them my own. But then it came to me 2 days later. THIS IS AN EVEN MORE IMPORTANT REASON TO GO THROUGH WITH THE INVESTIGATION. They are willing to do anything to protect my ex partner. I could have DIED by his hands and they would help him to cover it up. These people NEVER LOVED ME it was all an act and that makes the whole thing even more scary.

 

I am praying to God to help me to navigate through this situation. Sometimes i don’t understand why I go through so much. It’s destroying me I can feel it. I can only hope that there is light at the end of this very dark and treacherous tunnel.

[EvenSerpentsShine]

There was quite a few threads a while back about similar issues about talking about abuse.

Its really so difficult to know how people will react. Sometimes we get amazing support from places we least expect to, and then crushing betrayals from the people we trust the most.
It’s absolutely heartbreaking and can make you feel completely crushed for a while.

You will get over it given time. Many people believe that, like child abuse, domestic abuse isn’t something where anyone should ‘sit on the fence’ or take a neutral position. You’re either supporting an abused person or your supporting the abuser/abuse.

Your abusers family may feel that they have no choice but to support him. He is likely playing the victim and giving them all kinds of bleeding heart stories.
It’s really a shame that they can’t stand up to him, but it seems like it can be a step too far for some people. After all, it kind of reflects badly on them too doesn’t it and maybe forces them to ask some painful questions about their own family.

Feel for you about this.

Personally I was very hurt about similar things, but now I feel happy and proud that I’m so choosy about who I have in my life, I won’t tolerate enablers in any form and I’m happier for it.

[Author]

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