How did you leave?

[M1dn1ght]

Hello ladies,

I am at the point where I want to leave my abuser, I already had a meeting face to face with a support worker from womens aid and went through couple options of my escape. The problem is even though I want to, I just don’t seem to get myself to actually do it!! And I feel so angry at myself for this, because I feel like I’m just sitting here waiting for another rage and aggression outburst instead of actually leaving when I have a chance to do so safely.

Is there anyone who have now left but been in a similar situation while still being in an abusive relationship, how did you get yourself to leave?
I just want to hear other women stories who were in the same situation like me where they wanted to leave but found it hard to do it? Hoping to have some motivation to get me actually to do it. As I am off work at the moment for quite some time and it just feels like I’m walking on eggshells everyday. Sometimes I feel like texting my workplace and ask them if I could go back to work.

[Lisa]

Hi M1dn1ght,

Thank you for sharing with us. It is great to hear you have met with a Support Worker from Women’s Aid to explore options to leave. The thought of leaving can be very overwhelming so to have the support in place is really important.

Please do keep posting when you can, it can really help to share on here.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Grey Rock]

I had got to the stage where I had emergency clothes and wash things in the car boot and important documents stowed away at work. My wardrobe was organised so that the things I’d want to grab first were at one end and I had a drawer with priority items in too. I kind of hoped I’d find the strength at some point. When the next inevitable blow up happened I had my bag packed and in the car in minutes. I contacted a family member id seen a handful of times in the previous (detail removed by Moderator) years because I couldn’t get through to my mum’s phone. Stayed there one night on their sofa and by the next night had somehow managed to find somewhere to stay for a month.

It seems mad now. And it felt mad at the time too. A year and a bit on I’m in a council studio flat and things are much calmer and happier..

GR

[M1dn1ght]

Thank you for sharing your experience. Actually while he was drinking today, I didn’t want to stay in the same room as him so just went to the bedroom and started sorting out my clothes. I sorted some to put in the bin and some that could go to the charity, just to minimise the amount of clothes I have and when the time comes I will have less things to pack. But sorting them out so the priority stuff is on one side is actually a good idea, I will do that too, so thank you!

[Author]

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