How do i end a controlling relationship?

[Xxxdreamcatcherxxx]

Im 2yrs into a relationship with a man im finding since may has become very controlling. Always ringing to see where i am, if i dont answer immediately wants to know why. Hes making my life hell, he hates the children coming to me for love and cuddles, hates me going anywhere on my own, stopped me ordering pizza on wednesday for me and kids, when i tell him to stop sex if hes doing something im not comfortable with or being very ruff, he says no you like it really and carries on. Iv been through an abusive marriage and now this. Its my house, he has a key, stays over a lot, he has his own flat. Iv reached breaking point and i dont know where to start x

[Twisted Sister]

Hey Xxxdreamcatcherxxx,
It’s not going to be easy, as it could trigger a lot of anger and potentially violence.

Personally I would change the locks as soon as he leaves, and then text to say you can’t face any more in this relationship with him. I wouldn’t get into any convo at all, and just state that and say you’re not looking for any response and its not up for discussion.

I expect he will still reply and kick off,which iwhen you can repeat its definitely over for you, sorry, bye. But then be clear that you don’t want any hassle or stress around your children and if he persists, which I think is probable, threaten you will report for harassment as you’ve been clear it not up for discussion, your mind is set its not working for you.

You might also warn the police that you are going to do this on the basis of his controlling nature.

Warmest wishes ts

[KIP.]

Just wanted to add this is the most dangerous time when we end the relationship so please don’t be fooled into meeting him or letting him back in your home. Be prepared to carry out your threat and report him immediately he contacts you. Don’t be dragged into explanations or conversations. What the police want to see is that you have told him not to contact him and he persists to do this without you engaging. If you engage they will see it as an argument between two people. It might be worth changing your number and coming off all social media for a while too. Just for peace of mind. He ticks all the boxes for not going quietly x

[Author]

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