how do I leave?

[wishingiwaslucky]

I have been feeling very low for a long time. I have been with my partner for (timeframe removed by Moderator) years and he has slowly chipped away at me with put downs until I now have zero confidence and I feel numb inside. He has used me to get everything he wanted and has left me financially unstable.  I feel so trapped, it has been such a long time I don’t even no where to start. If anyone has any advice I would appreciate any help. I would like to get financial advice. I’m hoping there might be some help for a low rate as I am on minimum wage.

I wake up everyday wondering how I have ended up so miserable and with someone who thinks so little of me. I am incredibly lonely and just cant seem to see a way out, how would I manage both mentally and financially.

[Lisa]

Hi wishingiwaslucky,

Thank you for sharing with us. I am sorry to hear about what you are going through. You are doing the right thing by reaching out for support from others who understand. Have you had any contact with your local domestic abuse service? The local service can often offer ongoing emotional and practical support to help explore your options and make a plan with you. You can find your local service here if you feel able to get in touch.

Turn2us can be helpful in exploring available financial support based on your circumstances, you can find them here.

There is also The Financial Advice Line for Victims of Domestic Abuse provided by a partnership between Money Advice Plus and Surviving Economic Abuse. Details can be found here.

Keep posting when you can, you are not alone here.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[wishingiwaslucky]

Thank you Lisa for sharing the support groups . I will look these up, I haven’t heard of turn to us so that is very helpful, best wishes

[Sad and alone]

I completely understand the put downs and lack of confidence. Even when you do feel a bit of confidence they’ll knock you back down. It’s even harder to comprehend when you’ve been with someone a long time and you don’t think they were always this way.
Definitely see if you can get in touch with your local domestic abuse service as they can run through a lot of things with you and provide ongoing support.
Take care and post here if you need to. Lots of ladies have been in your position and can help with advice or just an ear to listen xx

[wishingiwaslucky]

Thank you for your support Sad and Alone. You are exactly right , every now and again I get a little boost of confidence then he knocks it straight back down again. The boosts are getting fewer and further and far apart as the years go on. I’m more tired the older I get. I feel stupid not to have seen this years ago. There were a few red flags in the beginning, he’d never had a girlfriend before me, his dad was always putting his mum down and his brothers struggled in relationships too.

[Author]

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