I am absolutely devastated.. it really was all me

[Starmoon]

He has a new girlfriend
Less than (detail removed by moderator) ago i terminated a pregnancy because i couldnt cope with it even though wed planned the baby together. But this just proves it was me that was wrong for him all along… i dont think i can live with this

[Tiffany]

Of course it doesn’t prove that you were wrong,all it proves is that he is good at manipulating other women as well as you.

[KIP.]

I agree with Tiffany. All it proves is he is a typical abuser. Lining up his next victim if he wasn’t already cheating behind your back (mine was and it’s very typical abuser behaviour). My ex made a point of letting me know too that he had a new relationship. Of rubbing my nose in his new relationship. I wonder how you found out? My ex made sure in knew. I would have kept any relationship quiet and secret from him but abusers make sure we know all about it. It’s actually written in ‘living with the Dominator’ how they will try to drag you back into their dysfunctional behaviour by making you angry and messing with your head with another woman. All it did for me was confirm that this was just another form of painful abuse. And I ran straight to a solicitor for a divorce. Enough is enough. Don’t fall for it.

[Starmoon]

I still love him. Im still so broken by losing him. I cant stand the thought of another man being near me. But hes met someone new, shes met his parents and his family. Once uppon a time they were my family. Im so broken

[Starmoon]

He has a child with someone els, hes never met her but me and this other girl talk now and again. She lives in another country and saw on his fb he is with someone new. I called his mum and she confirmed it, even met her

[KIP.]

My idiot ex plastered his new gf all over Facebook. What better way than to upset you. Even made sure it was all over her Facebook too. She was a friend of a friend of my sister so they must have known. Profile picture and all. He was still living with me. I know the pain this will cause you and I will tell you what my Women’s Aid worker told me. Let her have him. In 18 months time the honeymoon will be over and they will be facing reality. You on the other hand will be well on your way to recovery and a good new life free from abuse. How true that was. ❤️. If you allow him he will torture you for ever. She thinks she’s won first prize but in fact she’s won a huge booby prize. Cut him right out your life.

[KIP.]

I think his family will realise what a true monster he really is to be seeing another woman so soon. They should be ashamed even if he isn’t.

[Starmoon]

His mum said its nothing to do with her, hes an adult and she can hardly put him over her knee. I was hoping shed be a bit more understanding. If they have met her then they must all belive it will work out. Im honestly devastated. And its made me sick. I dont know if i should post on here. I dont know if he abused me or not but even if he did, theres notning to say i didnt deserve it and that this girl truly is the one for him but im heart broken and hate myself so much more for not being what he wanted

[Serenity]

Hi Starmoon,

He will manipulate, mistreat and control this next woman.

He may change his tactics a bit, as abusers need to tailor their abuse to the victim, but their purpose remains the same.

I have just come across a new concept/ phrase which I’ve not heard of before ( maybe others have): it’s ‘baiting and bashing.’

Look it up if you can. I think it really describes what you’ve been through.

[KIP.]

Hey, I found out my ex dragged her round his family early on. I think they do it to gain some sort of credibility with the victim. His mum sounds awful. I would be so ashamed if he was my son. You really do deserve better x

[Anonymous]

Starmoon I’ve read a lot of your posts whilst waiting for my account to be approved so I could post.. I’m feeling so many of the things you are x hugs x

[ineedtosurvivethis]

Wow, what a complete CAD!
He doesn’t like to be alone, that is all it is. Eventually this girl will be experiencing the same things as you did. He won’t change, he will always be like this. She is a rebound to hurt you.
Let him get on with it, I know its totally heartbreaking but this is the response he wants.
I can’t believe he could resort to being so cruel, but these guys have no morals, no respect, no dignity.
Its a shame that he, because she is totally oblivious to it.
You can do this. You are a very strong woman.
x*x

[Fuzzyfelt]

I feel your pain ; we all do. I have taken to visualising my ex as a big fat toad living in a pond of vile lies!
I think I’d feel exactly the same as you though … I’m off all social media and total no contact . But he still keeps popping up and poking me with a stick to get a reaction. It b****y hurts but I don’t respond .
You should avoid him, his family and ask people not to tell you what he’s doing.
Good luck and big hugs x

[Greyskydarkdays]

My partner has done that to me had a new girlfriend in minutes because he was already with her, she stayed with him at his mums, and she accepted it because he’s a grown man, she was the one who told me about it, but I didn’t want to course a fight so I signed up for Facebook and there it was all over been in a relationship for 3 months, I was jealous angry and hurt, and I let him no that, so he finished with her, and we got back together, years later I’m still stuck in this relationship, I hope u can’t get threw this time all my love to you

[Author]

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