- This topic has 5 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 6 months ago by Confused123.
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5th July 2016 at 10:32 pm #20994HealthyarchiveBlocked
Just sharing my thoughts and offloading….
I have felt to happy recently, that I were free of the ex and finally enjoying life. I’ve got rid of all male attachements that I have had, there is no male romantic presence in my life for the first time in 32 years. I’m feel fine and happy. The last few days I have been thinking warmly about my ex and missing him and feeling sad. Yearning for us to have contact, even just to share a couple of lines where I could say hello, i hope that you are well. I have no doubt that I have not wanted him since we finished (detail removed by moderator) months ago and I don’t want him now, but I just find the complete cessation of everything really painful.I have had quite severe and upsetting cravings, sadness, loneliness and depression over the last 2 days, feeling sad that we don’t have contact anymore. I suspect this might be tied into the fact that I sent him a friendly, innocent email 3.5 weeks ago, saying hello and wishing him well. He did not reply at all. I am wondering if him ignoring the email and effectively giving me the silent treatment is making me feel the yearning. I have no doubt I would never get back together with him. I would rather have been stalked and harassed by him than him discard me and us having zero contact for (detail removed by moderator) months, the silence of No Contact is so painful sometimes. -
5th July 2016 at 10:39 pm #20996SerenityParticipant
The silence is painful in its own way, HA, and it’s easy to forget how hurtful they Serrano how conniving.
You will get days when you slip back into nostalgia. But don’t give in to them.
Remember how you told us how he was after your money, to freeload? That’s who he is. The beautiful bits are mostly in our own mind.
They have shown us who they are: we must believe them. Any contact is toxic.
It’s imperative we protect ourselves from these cruel abusers. X
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5th July 2016 at 10:53 pm #21000HealthyarchiveBlocked
Thanks Serenity. I was thinking today that I brought this on myself, by sending him the email 3 weeks ago, I gave him the opportunity to ignore me. I done it with pure intentions but it has not helped me. At least i will learn. I think the only other weak spot I will have now when I want to make contact will be at Christmas or New Year, hopefully by then I’ll have some more coping skills under my belt. For the first year we together he was putting so much pressure onto me to move into my house. I have lived alone for many years and no man has ever been close to moving in. One day during a gas lighting cryptic ‘chat’ we were having he said ‘in the past I would have either moved in or we would have split up’. The pressure I felt was horrible. He felt completely entitled to rent out his own property, pocket everything and give me nothing. He was outraged and we had a big argument which lasted for days when I told him that he had to make a contribution. I suspected from very early on his initial motive for being with me as money. He earned a good £15’000 more than me as well.
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6th July 2016 at 1:55 am #21022Confused123Participant
Hey hun
everytime u miss him, put a post on here instead, u will be so greatful for it in the morning. ITs only cause we loved them we miss them, harsh reality is we have to keep ourselves away to protect ourselves, remember why u left
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6th July 2016 at 7:11 am #21028HealthyarchiveBlocked
Thank you Confused, i know that you are all right. X*X
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6th July 2016 at 10:43 pm #21129Confused123Participant
Hey HUn
Hope u feeling bit better today just give yourself time, remember what we missed was just fake anyway, see them as a drug that is not good for u, this is what i did to keep myself away from him and still do and i am further down the line
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