- This topic has 10 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 10 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
-
Not sure what the point of this is but just feel like I have no where to turn at this precise moment and need to let it out. Ive really let myself down. Ive been so strong in putting my boundaries in place and sticking to them over the past couple of months. But this week he got to me. I let him get into my head because im actually not strong. Hes worn me down. Now im feeling that horrible sense of dread in the pit of my stomach again. My head is spinning, my anxiety is raised. My body aches from the tension and i feel worn down. I just want to curl up and go to sleep. Im so, so sad about everything, his empty promises, my children not living their best lives and that I have failed them. I dont know what else to say, im just exhausted
-
@Tryingtofindhope Hey there I just couldnt go oast your post without commenting. You are an amazing lady you really are full of strength and bravery more than you know. Today is a bad day for you thats all it is, you have opened up to let him in again and so its no wonder you are feeling so down. You have to try and re ficas try and remember how far you have come how much you have achieved and re place those boundries find that increfable strength that you know is inside of you cause youve seen it. Dont let a bad day become a bad week a bad month a bad life dont lose that determination to make a better life for you and your kids dont lose hope.
My opinion is its normal to maybe open up to them again healing is tough its too tough at times but whats not ok is to allow them under your skin and take over once more. Dig deep sweetheart that strength is there somewhere. Stay safe lots hugs x-
Thank you nbumblebee. I know what you are saying is right and I recognise that I am only reacting to the situation the way I have to myself as safe as I can, but it just feels like a huge step backwards. I felt like my world was very slowly growing but now its shrunk back down again. I will get there eventually, one tiny step at a time. It just feels dark and lonely right now and Im struggling to see any light.
Thank you for your lovely words and support. Hope youre doing ok x*x -
Yeah i get that i truely do some days it all feels so black and dark you just cant see a way out. And i get the lonilness to thats what i really struggle with it eats away.
But like you said your world had started to open up and it will again you have jjst gotta believe and find that strength and hooe again.
It is there baby steps sweetie and you will open that world up again. Hugs x
-
-
I get days when I feel like I’m not strong. My partner is always telling me (detail removed by moderator). But you speak to people at womens aid places and they tell you you are strong. I never feel strong. I get slated when I get upset. I sometimes think we are polar opposites . Why did I ever say yes to going out with him in the first place . Still trying to find the strength to leave this he’ll hole
-
Your partner is telling you whatever he thinks will hurt you the most. He wants you to feel weak, so crushes you, then makes you feel bad for it. He puts you in impossible positions to keep you confused and exhausted.
Women’s aid tell you you’re strong because they know you are. You have to be strong to survive abuse. The strange thing is that you can be strong without feeling strong. I never thought I’d be strong enough to leave. Even when I left I didn’t feel strong, but I must have been strong enough.
I think our cultural views of strong people convince us that strong only looks one way. Add to that your abuser convinces you you’re weak and it’s no surprise you don’t feel strong.
You will find the strength you already have. Xxxx
-
-
@tryingtofindhope, nbumblebee is right, it’s a bad day. Healing/growing isn’t linear. You will feel like you’re going backwards sometimes but you’re not. It’s like a spiral, you think you’re in the same place as before but you’re actually looking at the same picture from a different place. You don’t lose the progress you’ve made. Hang in there. I know it’s really hard but you’re doing great, you really are . Xxxx
-
I know not all women are in abusive relationships . A lot of women are alright in there relationships . A lot of women come across to me as being very strong. I’m nothing like them . I know we are all different but they always seem stronger than me . But I suppose if they are in an OK relationship they will be strong won’t they . They won’t have that abusive extra tagging along . On odd days I think positive about myself only on odd days which don’t come along often.
-
Thank you for the lovely messages. It’s nice to have a safe place to put your thoughts out into the open but it’s sort of private. Who ever thought of this deserves a medal.
-
I am weak . I’ll never be strong ever . I’m like a waste of space. It’s not just husbands or partners that make you feel that way either . Why did my parents ever have me . What a total waste of space I am . Thanks for letting me get this out there.
-
I apologise unreservedly some of my posts are absolutely rubbish. Sorry
-
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
