Just woke up to being in a CC relationship

[Dino]

After a long relationship/marrige I finally woke up to the fact my OH was an abuser, controlling everything from access to family, friends & money, it was so subtle I really didnt see it, but now I look at I’ve been controlled through most of the relationship, I thought he cared, but he has to step up control so is trying to get me to put any excess money in his account as it keeps it altogether & is easier, then ‘we’ can see what weve got, I cant believe I was tryibg to convince my relations it was fir the best, I now realise you get so conditioned you sode with then when anyone tries to say anything against then, I’d get mad at the relative not the perpetrator, suddenly I jusy woke up & could see clearly the years of coersive behaviour, the temper tantrums when I didnt agreecwith him or do what he wanted, you lose your eill to fight & just do what they want for a quiet life, but it isn’t/wasnt, I cant believe I lived so long trapped, I want to be free of the abusive relationship & live free happy, its become so toxic over the years & just feel hatred for this person & want to be free.

Being on this forum has helped me see what I want, reading so many similar stories of all the struggles & some very positive stories of being out the otherside, its giving me hope & courage to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I’m trying to stay string & fight for freedom, good luck to all of you in similar position, stay strong & hope we can all come out the otherside X

[Lisa]

Hi Dino,

Thank you for sharing with us. It is great to hear the forum has helped you and is giving you hope. We are all here for you along the way so keep posting when you can. Have you had any contact with your local domestic abuse service for some ongoing emotional and practical support? If you would like to contact them to explore support options, the details can be found via this link: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/womens-aid-directory/

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Dino]

Hi Lisa, thank you for your response, the forum is a great help, knowing your not the only one who is suffering is a great help, some of the stories I can really relate to, also seeing some people have come so far gives me hope, but i still doubt I have the strength to stay afloat & sometimes wonder if it wouldnt be easier to just go back to ‘normal’ but deep down I know I cant allow myself to do that, on a positive note I have started counselling & feeling stronger for now, OH sees the difference & says he will change & do anything to make ut better, but I wonder do leperds change their spots, hes agreed to see a counsellor, so we’ll see how that goes, thank you for your support & wish everyone hope & peace of mind x

[Author]

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