Loose ends- dealing with a dominating ex

[Indeepindance]

Hi all,

Does anyone have experience of trying to retrieve personal belongings from an ex who won’t respond?

He has blocked me on everything since I left, I wrote to him (detail removed by Moderator) months ago to request my things with no response.  It’s an awful lot of stuff and a complication is that it’s held at his relative’s home and they are elderly so I don’t want to involve them unnecessarily.  It’s also many miles from where I live.

The relative hadn’t wanted it there to begin with but my ex insisted (I should’ve sensed things weren’t right just based on that), I now realise that was a horrible manipulation.

(detail removed by Moderator)

I don’t know whether to leave it, but there are some sentimental items as well I believe.

I just can’t understand why he would do this and withhold my property if he wants nothing more to do with me. (And I’m certain that is how he feels) after everything I said on the last day. It’s been months since we spoke.

Thanks in advance for your advice.

Xxxxx

 

[Lisa]

Hi,

Thank you for your post. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. This is likely about power and control for him- its something else he can hold over you- even though you are separated. The police may be able to support you with collecting those belongings, but I understand there is the added complication that he is storing them at a relatives house.

I would suggest seeking legal advice around your next steps as you are unlikely to get a response from him directly. You could contact Rights of Women for free legal advice. The Family law advice line offers advice on DV & abuse, divorce and civil partnership dissolution, relationship breakdown, issues relating to children. The Criminal law advice line offers advice on sexual offences, DV and harassment, police and criminal justice system, rights of victims, witnesses and defendants and criminal injuries compensation.

Best Wishes

Lisa

[Author]

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