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I’m starting to feel like I can cope again and that I’m not constantly thinking of him but he is now trying to abuse me in other forms. I have an injunction agaisnt him but (removed by moderator) he has called the police on me twice for allegations I never committed and one being that I abuse my son, I was sickened when the police officer phoned me and said they had been to the school and spoken with my son. Obviously completely not true and they are not taking it any further but I feel sick to my stomach that anyone could make that up. The fact we have a son together and I’m currently pregnant and he thinks he can do this to my eldest son (not his) makes me want to kill him!! He can hurt and abuse me as much as he wants but to bring my son onto this is absolutely inhumane. Has anyone else had similar problems
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Hi,
Just want to say our abusers will stoop to the lowest of low. He wants a reaction and they will ‘falsely accuse’, lie, do anything to get a reaction out of us. They need the drama, they need our anger, our rage, hurt, fear, upset etc. They will say and do what it takes to get that. They will use any horrible tactic. Its good though you made contact with us to get rid of your emotions (so understandable) instead of making contact with him.
Yes mine lied outright to the police saying I was out everynight of the week’ when caring for my children. He was hoping for my ‘righteous indignation’ at being lied about. I had to just ignore it and if the lies aren’t fed by our reactions then ‘the false accusations’ will die down.
Very tough to deal with though. Keep posting for lots of support.
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Thank you!
I’m so petrified of losing this baby because of him and he just doesn’t care.
My poor son has been having nightmares and teachers was concerned about what he was saying to friends about police etc and now police have questioned him at school!!! Just awful and totally unfair. Just annoying he can get away with it -
Hi
just wanted to say well done for feeling like your coping it’s a great feeling.
My kids are not my husbands they are from a previous relationship when we split my ex made up some disgusting lies he even went as low as to say my grown daughter tried it on with him I was devastated he could even think something do disgusting he practically raised her. They will try absolutely anything to get what they want. Your not alone x
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Wow really???? These men are disgusting!! Funny thing is my ex used to have terrible come downs and hit his own children from a previous yet I’m won’t stoop that low and go report him. Yes I reported the assaulted on me because I had enough considering I’m pregnant too but to make up lies of theft and abuse is so wrong. I’ve woken up terribly sad about it all. My eldest is with his dad this weekend but seeing his stuff lying around draws me to tears he’s a little boy and dosent deserve any of this. I got away and he is still causing destress for me and my children. It’s totally totally unfair!!!!!!!
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Hey there, perhaps get back in touch with women’s aid for support. I’d also consider making a complaint about the handling by the police. Was there an adult present (does the law say there has to be) during questioning. Note his malicious allegation for future. Log everything. You have to build up a picture of harrassment. I know it’s hard and youre exhausted but the courts need evidence. Go to your GP. Get it logged that his behaviour has greatly affected your mental health and potentially the health of your child. If he’s anything like my ex, this can go on for years and you want to be in the strongest position when it comes to court and access etc. None of this is your fault and if you’re waiting on him becoming reasonable (like I was) this won’t happen. Stay strong. All he has done is shown his true colours. A malicious unfounded accusation against a mother. Mine had me detained in a cell for five hours by accusing me of assaulting him. Complete nonsense. It’s like they can’t help themselves!
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Hey there, it’s not fair that you should move. However, I chose to stay and fight from my home (the marital home) and opened the gates of hell. I really dont think I could have done it if I was pregnant. I had to weigh up staying where I felt reasonably safe with a good support network round me and police bail or restraining order. I figured that I’d be scared no matter where I went so I chose to stay put. I think perhaps women’s aid think that if you move, you might get some peace until the baby comes. Perhaps for the sake of the baby you might want to move, if practical, where you can feel safe until after the birth? My husband has bad mouthed me to anyone who will listen too. It just shows them for manipulators they are. Concentrate on your own recovery and do what is best for you and your children X
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Thank you. I’ve now found out today he’s seeing someone else. I should be feeling relieved but I’m not. I feel so terribly down. He can move on and meet someone new make effort, make her feel special while he makes no effort to see his son!!!!! He also knows I can’t go out and meet anyone (not that I want too) cos I’m pregnant. I know I have the best thing and that’s my children but I feel abandoned. He should be looking after me, loving me not some dog. His emotional roller coaster is mentally draining 😢😢😢😢
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The ex abuser invented something and reported me when I was already out and I had to go for an interview with the police and they threatened me that it would go to court.
I had to collect all evidence I could get and fight tooth and nail that they believed me.
It was a really nasty lie and very obvious and I was furious that anybody would believe this.
In the end I presented my evidence and nothing happened.
But the additional stress was awful until I was out of this problem. -
This seems to be a typical trait of these losers. They love to run and tales to the police about us. Mine even managed to get my (removed by moderator) to ring the police. They arrived thinking there’d been violence,me against him! Yes they’re arch manipulators and will use anything and anyone to control a situation or person. Look at the way Trump trashed Hilary and then said no hard feelings and yes didn’t he threaten to have her locked up. They think they’re untouchable above the law. They don’t need to obey the law but everybody else does cos they’re stupid. They’re liars of the first water, if they’re talking they’re lying.
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