Viewing 5 reply threads
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    • #123574
      Busyditch
      Participant

      I’m doing the best I can in planning how I leave, but it’s throwing up so many questions and emotions. I know it would help to call the hotline, BUT why am I finding it so hard to call that number??

      I am so stupid, I’ve dialled so many times!! But I always back out of speaking to anyone.

      Why am I doing this?? 😩

    • #123575
      KIP.
      Participant

      I did it too. For me I think it came from the fear and guilt that I’d been brainwashed with. I did it eventually and the ladies were fantastic. The first time I couldn’t speak and the lovely lady just spoke and said it was okay if I didn’t want to speak and that she was here to listen to me when I was ready. I think confronting it also makes it more real and that’s scary. So next time try to hang on for a few seconds that’s build up. They won’t tell you to do anything they will listen and advise x I was just to traumatised from the abuse, even talking about it sent me into panic so take your time x

    • #123581
      gettingtired
      Participant

      Yes I’ve really struggled to call helplines. I have called some a couple of times including the National abuse helpline and the lady was lovely. She told me how brave I sounded and confirmed partmer was being abusive.
      Could you try emailing somewhere first to build your confidence? I emailed Supportline yesterday and they had responded within an hour and were really good xx

    • #123709
      Busyditch
      Participant

      I did it… last night was horrific and I have started to process to get out. The referral is happening as I type this. Now, I wait I guess. 😳

      • #123728
        gettingtired
        Participant

        Hey well done for calling. I know how scary it feels having to speak it out loud to someone x

    • #123734
      Bettertimesahead
      Participant

      After an incident last summer I got a call from domestic abuse team. Police had done a referral. I had started researching controlling behaviour etc for a few months before as I knew something wasn’t right but getting that call was something I’ll never forget. Still find it difficult to accept now, still have days where I think ” but we had such good times”, generally things were good. Then I think yes but what about the bits in between. I can think of lots of examples where a weekend away would be marred but a strop from him or an incident where I was supposed to wear certain clothes or where he just wouldn’t join in family fun.
      Well done on reaching out x

    • #155074
      StrongLife
      Participant

      I called initially once or twice. It was very scary to do this. Very dangerous.

      I then endeavoured to call more and they moved me from hotel into refuge once I had left and was too scared as I had left completely.

      Please keep calling.

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