So disheartened

[Knittingmum]

Just a little vent

I’m currently going through the motions of services and managing child contact following an abusive relationship but I feel I hit road block after road block. It seems unending you think the hard bit is actually leaving but im still dealing with things. Police just drop things, or he gets put on bail and as soon as it ends he’s contacting and showing up. I’m trying to move on a buy a house so I have something for my kids and the legal system count all my hard savings as cost towards fighting him because he cant act like a normal being. I’ve had social services involved and they call me his name by mistake, had my local dv services involved and you get passed around and told we can only help for 4 weeks even if i have limited availability, its the children school holidays i have limited childcare and dont want to be talking about things in front of the kids. I just feel so sad and disheartened and alone, We are victims and victimised further. It makes me think what’s the point sometimes 😪

[Lisa]

Hi Knittingmum,

I’m really sorry that you’re feeling so unsupported by services at the moment. You’re doing all the right things and reaching out everywhere and you deserve to have support provided in a way that you can access and that works for you. I’m glad that you’re venting here, it sounds so frustrating and tiring.

With him contacting you and showing up, you could look into getting a Non-Molestation Order which is a civil law injunction used to prevent a perpetrator from intimidating, harassing, pestering, or using or threatening violence in cases of domestic abuse. DV Assist are a specialist injunctions service who would be able to answer any questions you have.

Take care and keep posting,
Lisa

[Watersprite]

So agree with you on this it can be every which way you are beaten down as the systems are not set up to deal with abusers whose main focus is to punish you for leaving they are not normal. But you are doing amazing and non molestation order really helped us when we were at the stage you are. NCDV got
Me my non mol Also a little message of hope – it took years and at some points I never ever thought it would end but it did. Keep reporting even if no action it forms a picture. Take care it’s really hard x

[Knittingmum]

Thank you for the reply. If charges get dropped this time I will look into the non mol. Thanks for the words of encouragement watersprite, it’s so nice to know that there can be peace at the end of the long road.

[Author]

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