Telling family

[OUTTHEOTHERSIDE]

How do pepole find the strength to tell their family whats going on. Im terrifeid but at breaking point emotionally, financially and mentally. I just cant carry on like this i need their love and support. I know it will break them to and they will be there for me. I know when i tell them this nightmare will really start as i will have to leave but im just terrifeid of the consequences. But cant carry on. Sorry if im rambling 😕

[KIP.]

My mum said she wished I’d told her sooner so she could have helped. Abuse thrives on silence. Get support from your local women’s aid too. Sometimes you have just got to take that leap of faith and bypass the brainwashing from your abuser. Abusers are liars x

[OUTTHEOTHERSIDE]

Thankyou for your reply KIP. Im in touch with my local womans aid and we talk on the phone weekly. To be honest i feel like im wasting her time as im not moving forward. Im just terrifeid because of the threats to take that leap. Just wish it wasnt nearly christmas as feel i will ruin it for my family if i tell them now.

[Lifebegins]

I finally told my family 3 days after I went to the police. They live quite far away and it was so hard to make those calls as I felt so embarrassed and ashamed. But they were fantastic as were my friends (the very few I had left), work colleagues and employer. I spent so long hiding the abuse because of the shame when actually he should’ve been the one to be ashamed. I also didn’t speak out because I knew once I’d done so, there would be no going back for me as I’d done so many times before.

I would say that everyone who’s left has felt as you feel. It’s a big step. There’s posts just been bumped about the red line and what’s stopping you leaving which are really worth a read xx

[OUTTHEOTHERSIDE]

Thankyou for your reply lifebegins.
The things holding me back are not being believed as have never called the police and the threats of taking my child to another country.

[Onwardsupwards]

I’ve just left but don’t feel confident telling my family. They’d believe me but id feel guilty for doing it. I have told his brother/brothers wife about the abuse. They were very supportive and told me they had suspicions but didnt realise how bad it had been. They told me to contact them if I needed anything and told me I should have told them a long time ago.
I hope all goes well for you ❤

[KIP.]

It’s very common to fear not being believed probably because he’s told you that to keep you from speaking out. I believe you. Every single woman on this sit believes you. Your support worker believes you. Think of the truth as a rip ok in a choppy sea. You hang onto that truth as the waves try to wash you off but you know that truth. You have loved that truth. The alternative is a life of abuse. You’re already at breaking point. Reach out now, use this breaking point as momentum for action x

[Camel]

Hello OTOS

You only really need to tell people that you’re in a bad place and need their help and support. It’s not necessary to go into great detail in one go. If you’re in physical danger, that’s the important thing to get across. And maybe you should tell the police that he’s threatening to take your child out of the country?

[Author]

Posts