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Ok I am back within his reach, and despite staying well away for months a few glasses of wine and on my own late at night and I messaged him. Did he want to meet up. Omg what was I thinking, absolutely mortified and been down this road so many many times before. He of course said SURE, fortunately it was e-mail rather than a text or WhatsApp ( those are blocked and staying that way) So I didn’t see the reply till next morning, I feel so embarrassed. Now my pattern has changed and yes I did reply but said on reflection I didn’t think it was a good idea to meet up. I then got a reply about how great he feels having moved on and all the exciting things he is doing with his life. Yeah easy when you are living is a nice comfortable house while I am living out of a suitcase.
I am feeling both positive and rubbish at the same time. And I am aware his positivity is 99% rubbish but if did the trick it hurt me. -
Morning hiya@
The dreaded wine witch strikes again! It happens to the best of us so don’t beat yourself up about it- I’m sure feeling how you’re feeling now, it won’t happen again.
Of course he’s having a brilliant time- they all are. Funny how if his life is so amazing now you’ve gone, that they spent so much time and energy trying to keep you in the relationship. And he wanted to meet up as soon as you suggested it, so his actions speak otherwise.
Old habits die hard and we’re used to contacting them, good or bad, in all sorts of situations. You woke up this morning, realised the blip, put it right and can move on.
As a safety measure, do you need to have him on email? Maybe remove the app from your phone so you have to log in on computer so it’s a big faff to do it whilst having a drink? I’m planning to do this over the summer so I can get away from the constant bombardment of emails and have a digital detox where I only log in 1-2 times a week.
Try and forget it now but know you’re not alone ❤️ Great that you’re feeling positive too. Sometimes it takes making a mistake and not falling into old patterns, that makes us realise how far we’ve come.
Sending you a big virtual hug 🤗🤗🤗 xx
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