- This topic has 5 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 10 months ago by
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So the peace ended surprise surprise! No sunshine rain flower I don’t have an exit plan in place, I did try to ring the helpline but i couldn’t get through. I’ve tried a few times and never get through, still makes me nervous/anxious when I try to phone like I’m doing something wrong or my situation is not as bad as others so I shouldn’t be wasting everyone’s time. Thanks so much for your reply. X
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No one should have to live like this. I did for decades. Now I have that total calm and bliss permanently in my own home. If I can do it then you can too. The anxiety and walking on eggshells ruins your mental health. I used to wish mine would die in an accident while out. And I meant it. What a way to live with someone who should cherish you above all else.
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Can you ring them and leave a message? Then they will call you back. It sounds like you have normalised the abuse which is what we all do, and the abuser encourages it – they make us think it’s our fault. It isn’t. KIP is right, nobody should have to live like this so don’t give up.
I felt exactly the same, that I would be wasting their time. I’m still shocked by people’s horrified reaction when I tell them about my ex, because in my mind what he did is nowhere near as bad as other stories I read, but it’s probably because it’s my story. No matter how severe the abuse, it is all still abuse, and will eventually get very severe anyway as it always escalates.
Keep writing on here too and we can help you with a plan too and talking through your options.
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Thank you so much lovely ladies. You are completely right in that I have normalised the abuse, how sad that it has been decades and it is just my ‘norm’.like you say everything is my fault and he always says how lucky I am because other women have it so much worse than I do. It’s absolutely crazy and you are right in that it’s starting to take its toll on me. KIP as awful as it sounds I completely understand what you mean, I wish when he goes out that he would never come back. I have quite a few children and work full time to provide for everyone so I find it really tricky to find time where I can focus and ring the helpline without anyone around and at a convenient time. I am trying to ring rights of women too as I want to know exactly where I stand with regards to my babies before I make any moves, there is no way he is having them. Thank you for your support ladies.
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