29th October 2021 at 9:29 pm #133203KeepbeingbraveParticipant
Good evening all.
I have written on these forums a few years back. When I was desperate for advice and support whilst I was trapped in a pretty vile physically and mentally abusive relationship.
I promised to share my outcome so here it is.
I finally managed to break free in (detail removed by Moderator). And boy was it the hardest thing I have ever had to endure, but it was so completely worth it. If you have the strength to survive an abusive relationship then believe me, you have the courage and the strength to walk away. I endured months of mental torture, him wanting me back, me wanting him back. I feel like I went to hell and back battling my own feelings. And I felt empowered and weak all at the same time. Proud I had broke away but literally on edge that I would slip and end up going back. After three months of no contact I finally started to feel stronger. I spoke to the police and told them my story, they are still investigating this as my medical records have been requested etc.
But, right now…(detail removed by Moderator) months after kicking him out I am a different person. I am not the same person that I was before the abuse, and I’m not the same person I was during the abuse. I finally feel relaxed. I smile to myself and I have re-established a great deal of my life. I have finally told my family and friends what I went through.
I think the whole point of me telling this story (sorry for rambling) is that one day even when you think your life is so dark and you will never have the strength to escape you CAN. And life on the other side is pretty amazing even if it takes a lot of readjusting to.
People keep telling me how much happier I seem in myself, how much happier I look. But the important thing is how much happier I feel. It’s possible when there was times I thought I could never do it. I am so proud of myself and I have so much respect to anyone who has managed it aswell. I have so much respect for those who are still going through it, it’s a horrible dark time.
30th October 2021 at 2:16 pm #133228Wants To HelpParticipant
It is so nice to read your positive outcome and that things are going so well for you now. Stories like this are so inspiring for others and if confirms there really is a good life after abuse.
For a long time now I have been able to accept invitations without any worries, have my hair however I want it, make plans and look forward to them without fear of them being sabotaged, come home at what time I want to, wear what I want without being told I look fat or scruffy (if I want a day in my scruffs that’s also liberating 🙂 ) I used to think my life was ‘not that bad’ when I was with him, but now I know what freedom of choice and movement is, well, yes, it was ‘that bad’ when I was with him.
There are times when being single can get lonely, but I’d much rather be lonely alone than lonely in a relationship.
30th October 2021 at 4:36 pm #133230nbumblebeeParticipant
I really do Love reading these posts it gives me hope holds me up during my dark days. My favourite part of your post was the simple line you wrote “I smile to myself” I really do love that and tell myself one day, one day that could maybe be me.
A huge well done to you takes so much courage i believe to leave or to make him leave I really do hope you continue to grow and learn and enjoy your new life.
30th October 2021 at 6:11 pm #133232NeverthoughtitwouldbemeParticipant
I needed to hear this today after having a tough day mentally.
So amazing to hear that you are happy. You should be very proud of yourself and how far you have come.
Sending all the love xx
31st October 2021 at 7:05 am #133250LovingLifeParticipant
This made my morning! So happy for you to feel free, relaxed and smiling. Keep shining your beautiful light into the world 🙂
20th November 2021 at 9:47 pm #134350KeepbeingbraveParticipant
Thank you so very much for your responses, things are getting better and better each day, and the bad days are far and few in between now. For those who have managed to break away, I am immensely proud of you. For those who are still trying..I am proud of you. And for anyone who is living each day just trying to cope, I am proud of you aswell. Much love to you all xx
22nd November 2021 at 3:47 pm #134459EyesopeningParticipant
Hi, Keepbeingbrave, you sum it up so well, its touching to read. I am months out now and just went through all this. I have to remind myself to be proud of myself as I haven’t told my family or friends yet the full story, I feel like it’s easy to sweep under the rug the immenseness of what I have been through.
23rd November 2021 at 1:35 am #134507brokenheartedgirl1234Participant
your words and story gives us all hope thank you so much for sharing you are truly a beautiful inspiring soul
23rd November 2021 at 6:06 am #134509BettertimesaheadParticipant
Love this. I’m out but not at the stage yet where everything is great but still appreciate the little things. The wearing scruffs things resonated, I love putting on a big baggy hoodie and noone getting stroppy about it.
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