after today

[betterdays]

I’m starting to feel so angry inside revengeful. I feel helpless empty inside. I could give him such a blasting but it would do know good. I cant do NOTHING x

[Healthyarchive]

Dear Betterdays. I am not sure what to advise you about having revenge and making contact with him to have a go.

I knew after reading all of the abuse books & all of the advice on here that No Contact was the best. That is why I don’t know what to advise you. At the same time, I contacted him by sending him one email (detail removed by Moderator) weeks ago and me doing that gave me a form of closure which I really desperately needed for months. I have felt no urge to contact him since and I felt happy after I sent him that as his response gave me confirmation that he was horrible. So I don’t know the best thing to advice you about that, sorry. I have recently read a book which you may find helpful which is all about getting revenge and how to do it. Its free to read on Amazon, Revenge by HG Tudor. Its not that long and you can probably read it over a couple of days.

There is lots that you can do in the meantime.

You can start to put all of your energies into making your life and your sons lives 100% better than they were before. You have a break coming up and have taken a positive move by being so driven after today’s hospital appointment. It is not easy making the emotional break away from the horrible ex, you might have days and moments when you feel really lonely, low, sad and want to contact him or another man to take his place. You have your DV support worker to help you and the women on this forum who care about you. Please do try to stay strong and take each moment, one step at a time. Don’t forget about the really good trauma bonding link that is available and the Zari Ballard book N********t Free.

Keep posting and sharing how it is going. We are all thinking of your and praying for your happiness. X*X

[Healthyarchive]

Dear Betterdays,

This situation can be turned around. Turned around to a better, more positive life for you and your three bright, gifted and talented sons. Please do post on here all of the time, even if nobody replies to you, don’t worry as they/we might be busy or not able to. Sometimes its good just to write and get it off your chest as its therapeutic. I think that you are going to face a very challenging year or so, whilst you adjust to being on your own, i know that you have been apart for a year now but after today it sounds as though you have decided to get rid of him for good. So there will be adjusting to life on your own, trying to manage and deal with everything. You are so much stronger than you believe that you are. In (detail removed by moderator) years I have never, not even for one week, been without a man somewhere in my life in a romantic sense. I always believed that I needed someone to make me stronger and cope more easily. I have given up men now for a while and I can honestly say that I’m gradually developing more personal inner strength. I feel subtle changes in my life. People are more positive towards me, my bosses are impressed with me and my health and fitness is good. My home also looks lovely and I am sleeping well. Betterdays you have this strength within you, please give yourself a bit of time, definatly not getting back with the ex, but not with anybody else either as you will discover your strength and confidence. X*X

[Author]

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