Been reflecting as you do and accepting the long term effects of the abuse . I couldn’t have friends because of him , I didn’t want anyone to know what I was dealing with so I isolated myself . My children couldn’t have friends over because I didn’t want them to find out either ! No big birthday parties because of his behaviour and intent on ruining everything that wasn’t about him !! My children played outside the house with neighbourhood children or just at home with each other . Reflecting now I can see how it hindered us all in forming friendships then & still now all grown up and left hone !We all rather sit alone at home which is sad ….What a selfish , vile & controlling trait to have as a human to impact peoples mental health like that ! Fortunately for us dispute his attempt of downtrending we are all positive , polite, genuine , cheerful and likeable people .He will always be evil !!!!