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the stuff my dad has put me through has got me so damaged. men scare me and the one man who doesn’t scare me ( my boyfriend ) i constantly annoy 🙁 a slight change of tone and i completely spiral because of past trauma and i’m so sick of it and wish this fear would go away
me and my bf went away and there was something said that set off my brain and i completely lost it and had a (detail removed by Moderator) hour panic attack and completely wrecked the night and he was so visibly annoyed that i ruined it all and that i get set off by things
i feel like i’m not able to be loved and my self esteem is so low i’m scared that i can’t be in a relationship but it’s all i want
it’s like this abuse has caused a mental block that stops me from feeling loved by anyone . i am so scared my bf will leave because i get set off because of past events with my dad and i just have a mindset which convinces me that everything my dad has said is true and it wrecks my relationship because i spend it overthinking and i feel like such a horrible person -
Hi unsinkableunicorn,
When you have grown up reading the subtleties of an abusers tone, it can be very hard to interpret those tones in any other way.
Have you had any counselling? It might help you to see things more objectively so that you are more able to work out if you are over reacting or if you do indeed have good reason to panic.
When you have been traumatised by abuse, it can be very difficult to understand relationships from any other perspective. It can also leave you vulnerable to predatory abusers.
Please consider seeing your GP to see if you can get any counselling. xx
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