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    • #134666
      Bluetac1
      Participant

      Myself and my partner have been together for just over a decade now. We were just out of high school when we got together and have grown up together. We have always had a good relationship, the usual squabbles that you have etc but I have always felt respected and safe.
      My partner was heavily affected by Covid, as a result of the lockdowns etc he moved in with my at my parents (we were saving to buy our own home). From this point onwards was when things started to get bad. There is no denying what has happened is abuse – it’s always been emotional abuse but I feel all my boundaries have been crossed and I no longer feel respected or safe. I asked him to move out and back to his parents which he reluctantly agreed to, we haven’t broken up I just needed some space due to how toxic things had become.
      Since we have had some time apart my partner has admitted that he has a mental health issue, he cannot remember a lot of the things he has said and it makes so much more sense now. I always wondered how we could say such horrid things and the next day pretend everything was fine but I do now genuinely believe that he doesn’t remember. He has now admitted he needs help and has started on anti depressants and is seeing a therapist.
      I feel so conflicted as I begged him to get help and he continued to be emotionally and verbally abusive towards me. I feel that he has only now agreed to help because I stood up against him and now his actions have consequences for him.
      Has anyone else has experiences of this? His behaviour would change in an instant and I could recognise it from a mile away his eyes would become glossy and his pupils would be huge. He would slur his words and couldn’t pronounce things properly, he couldn’t walk properly and would act as if he was drunk when he wasn’t. He would then go to sleep and the next morning he would be fine.

      Has anyone had any experience with this sort of behaviour? I feel like I’m going insane and don’t know whether to believe him or not. I know it’s not drink related as it can happen right in front of my eyes when he hasn’t been out of my sight for hours. Could it be a genuine medical condition or is this just manipulation to make me feel bad?

    • #134833
      Stuckinturmoil
      Participant

      I put a post on the other day. My husband has (detail removed by moderator) he has explosive rages if he has low or high blood sugar or a quick change in blood sugar. Looking back he was still angry before he developed this condition. I think he has PTSD too.

      (detail removed by moderator)

      It does sound like there is an issue. But it is still not your job to put up with abuse.

    • #134854
      StartingOverAgain
      Participant

      As previous poster said, whether or not it is a genuine ‘condition’ – you have described it as abuse and that is what it remains.

      You have done really well to create some distance on this. It is not your problem to solve and you have choices here. More so now that living situations are not mixed up with each other.

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