Hello Mayflower, just sending you wishes for healing and calm for yourself. I know a lot of women struggle terribly at times of any kind of anniversary after getting out, and i think it feels like such a backward step sometimes, even tho, like Lisa has said, you have come so far forward.
These times of feeling shakey about it all feel like such set-backs, and you really have achieved so much. Fought so hard to hang on in there and stay out. You have your feelings to remind you that he was pain in your life before.
warmest wishes xx