Another tactic

[ConfusedAgain]

now he cant get to me through the police he has called a mutual frriend and paid the sympathy card (detail removed by moderator), my answer was no, mutual friend says he is in bits…..

[duvetday]

Argh.. well done for saying no! He probs isn’t “in bits”, just annoyed he isn’t in control and you’ve set a boundary.

[KIP.]

Well done for saying no. It’s just a ploy to get to you. He’s in bits because he has no one to abuse and dump his rubbish on. You did the right thing. Expect more attempts. I would tell your ‘mutual friend’ not to get involved or pass on messages, it’s not helpful. Stay strong x

[Freedomfighter]

Hi Confusedagain, sorry you’re having these problems. These men are so versatile and adaptable. If they can’t get us to submit one way, they always have something else up their sleeves. One way or another they are brilliant at hurting us. It’s a constant, exhausting battle all the time. It’s no wonder so many of us crack, they are relentless. Stay strong. Keep reminding yourself how much he exaggerated and lied when you were together. I’m assuming like mine if he couldn’t get me with his battle front ‘take no prisoners’ tactics he would try the poor old me wounded soldier act. At the end of the day, even he is suffering that’s HIS fault. He should have treated you properly when you were together. I was really worried about mines reaction when I go. I know I can survive his bullying, but I feared he’d use my son to break my heart like last time. That’s why I gave them all the chance to get behind me, work together to fix things. I really want to go, but was willing to stay if they all made an effort. I’m telling myself if they love me they would be bending over backwards to keep me here. Anything after I go is just panic lies as it dawns on them that they’ll have to do everything themselves and my husband will lose a chunk of what he considers ‘his’ money. Probably a hell of a lot easier to say than do, but that’s what I keep telling myself. Tell your mutual friends how much it hurts and if they continue then cut them out of your circle. This friend is not the one who has had to live with his abuse and has no right to torture you
Tell them straight quit the torture or loose you as a friend. If they care about you they won’t do it again. Hugs

[Author]

Posts