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    • #81200
      onceuponadream
      Participant

      Been to see OH (detail removed by moderator) after trying to maintain as little contact as possible… Can’t go no contact because we have a business to run… Which he is in full Conttol of even tho im joint shareholder… However… Had to go over and speak to him… So anxious now… 3 hours after leaving there and I’m just feeling like I can’t cope. My head is racing telling me I can’t do this my chest is aching… He has once again made decisions about the business without consulting me… Again… Even when we were still together this would happen… But again he started blaming both of us on the breakdown of the relationship and being very passive aggressive… How do I get through this… Im waiting on counselling and to go on the freedom program and on solicitors…. But how do I cope… When my head just wants to implode… I feel like I’ve made a right mess of things. I’m trying so hard to build myself back up and piece myself together but it’s like I can’t find all the pieces. X sorry just needed a place to vent. X

    • #81205
      fizzylem
      Participant

      Can you get hold of the accounts?

      Sounds like he will need to buy you out at some point. He will do anything to try not to pay you, so if you can get hold of the financial info this would be great.

      You clearly dont want to be there, do you still get paid whether you show up or not? x

    • #81216
      KIP.
      Participant

      Abusers will use any connection to continue the abuse. Children, finances, housing, etc. I think you need legal advice. As previously said, try to get hold of any financial evidence. He will already be hiding money and putting things in place to limit anything you get from the business. In his mind you’re entitled to nothing and while he hold the business strings, he’s in control of you financially and knowing you will need to contact him is where he gets his power. If it’s a business worth lots of money it might be worth looking at having it audited and valued? Certainly for divorce purposes it will need to be valued. You also have to consider your mental health. You need to me mentally healthy to deal with the mentally unhealthy. Is there someone who can intervene on your behalf. A family member or friend who would communicate business matters so you don’t have direct contact?

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