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Hello.
I’m new to this forum.
So I split from ex partner (childrens dad) of (detail removed by Moderator) years.
It started off amicable. Arranged for him to see the kids every week. But now what I realise is I am suffering abuse from him. Online, verbal. He has done this for years but now I’m just realising it. He is now beginning to say he is entitled to half the child benefit And half child maintenance I receive for the children and that he will take me to court. To me it’s not about the money I just want my children to be happy and to have some peace in my life. What do I do ? -
Hello and welcome. My advice is to cut all direct contact with him and use a third party. Do it via text or email so that there’s a written record. These men don’t change and often get worse post separation. Still craving control. Just know that nothing you do will appease him because he will simply move the goal posts. Make sure you are legally the primary carer. Get some free legal advice from Rights of Women. Most solicitors will offer a free initial session. Contact your local women’s aid too. You do not have to put up with his abuse. He will probably abuse you more if the kids are there because he knows you will give in to spare them witnessing it. You cannot co parent with an abuser. They anti parent. Set firm boundaries. Get a legal contact order in place. It will save him messing you around for years. But mostly build a good support network of other victims, GP, womens aid, solicitor or legal advice, family and friends who can act as a third party. There are also apps I believe for parents who separate but any direct contact he will use to abuse you x
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