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    • #99753
      TakingMeBack
      Participant

      I’ve been out nearly (detail removed by moderator) now and mostly I’m fine. Kind of just living life normally with bouts of anxiety and low self esteem at times but doing life as normal.

      Sometimes I stop and think though, how am I supposed to just live as if this never happened? I thought I met someone so amazing that made me feel the bets I ever have. This person to then make a relentless attempt to ruin my life (still trying!). It’s just a bit mad trying to process that someone you thought was amazing is pure evil and made every attempt to destroy you when you just loved them?

      I’ve read quite a few books about n*********s etc. so I feel I know and understand how it works and is not my fault. Was just looking to see if anyone had read any books about someone’s journey after leaving that’s relate-able and gives hope and positivity?

    • #99775
      Cecile
      Participant

      The guy who wrote ‘Why does he do that?’, Lundy Bancroft, has published another for the afterwards.Its called ‘The joyous recovery’. Also I am reading ‘getting past your past’ by Francine Shapiro who invented EMDR therapy. I found both very helpful as I am at the end of this relationship and planning what to do about my trauma and the impact of his behaviour on me when I am free. There’s another called ‘healing from Hidden Abuse’ by Shannon Thomas, other people have re commended this one on the forum. All good books if you have not read them.

    • #99780
      fizzylem
      Participant

      I would say any biography where the person has overcome adversity sounds like what you might be looking for, or maybe female pioneers? So probs best you have a look at the books in this section to see if there’s anyone you’re interested in.

      I don’t think we can carry on like nothing happened, it changes us, but you can either let it eat you up, continue to let it destroy, or you can find ways to take from it, learn and grow – and make the adjustment you need so that all is well in the world again; eventually trauma feels like a gift because it teaches many things x

    • #99781
      KIP.
      Participant

      I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
      The Railwayman is also about overcoming abuse

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