Can someone tell me if I need to contact a WA worker

[Ariel]

Basically my son he’s adult age had an altercation with my ex partner all verbal.
At the time my ex called me and said he is going to hurt my son, I put this down to anger and dismissed it. I recently met up with him to talk where everything was lovely and all that, but then he said the only reason I’ve not hurt your son is because I love you so much. He went on saying if he didn’t love me he would have done something by now.
I don’t know how to respond to this. I walked away from out meet caught up in the emotion of him until I got home and refelectrd back on what was said.

[Ariel]

I have that strong pull towards him I think I’m in a Trauma bond, I’m realising how abusive he is but at te same time I keep thinking he might change. He also is fighting an addiction which has recently come to light and explained a lot.

[Lisa]

Hi Ariel,

It sounds really frightening that he’s threatening violence against your son, that’s in no way okay. It must be confusing seeing him and hearing about how much he says he loves you given how he’s treated you in the past. Addiction doesn’t cause or excuse abuse. Abusers often blame their behaviour on addiction and that can be a way that they keep their power and control, by making their partner or ex think they need to support the abuser and help them to change. No one can tell you whether you need to reach out for support from your local domestic abuse service, it’s really important that you’re in control of the decisions about what support you want and when. I can say that you deserve to have support. If you’re feeling unsure, you could use our Live Chat service to speak to a Women’s Aid worker about your situation and your options. They won’t tell you what to do but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you.

Take care and keep posting,
Lisa

[Author]

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