Can you help Explain behaviour

[Mellow]

I’m still living with my abuser I’ve had support on leaving and no longer in relationship there are a few things annoying me he has always said he dosent care what I wear and I’ve started getting more confident buying new clothes he keeps giving me dirty looks and looking me up and down sighing in a bad way what does this mean.I’ve been wearing some very seductive things as it’s been sunny im just trying to understand

[Mellow]

Also he’s occasionally had opinions on my clothing Saying I looked ugly and he can make me look better (removed by moderator) some of the clothes I’ve got are tight but they are what I want for me not picked for me but this time I’m being looked down on

[Mellow]

Well didn’t make me but bought them for me

[Escapee123]

It sounds like he is trying to damage your self esteem and manipulate your behaviour by showing his distaste for your outfit in the hope you will dress differently.x

[Mellow]

It feels like in his head he is saying what is that?or something and what he’s doing I’ve ignored it and carried on cause I like the clothes and I do think I look good they suit my figure .it’s wierd because I’ve been avoiding eye contact now I’m not sure if I should hold my head up cause I feel like he’s trying to make belittle me. (Detail removed by moderator).I’m determined to not let it get to me I’ve started wearing everything I like he used to tell me not to wear my favourite (removed by moderator) as it was childish but I’ve started doing it now cause I don’t care

[Mellow]

But I still sometimes have this feeling of should I buy that but this time I said no I’m always going to like that (removed by moderator) I didn’t want it to be a constant reminder of him not liking it cause I do

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Mellow

You are no longer in a relationship with him, as you know that he is abusive. His opinions and behaviours no longer matter to you, you are not together. Its basically none of his business, but he is still going to behave the way an abuser behaves, ignore him if you can.

Like you say, you don’t care, and that a good place to be, really good.

warmest wishes

ts

[Cosmicasca]

I think everything he’s saying to you is the absolute opposite of what you are, and probably what he thinks of himself. He’s trying to put you down because he knows perfectly well you are not ugly, and that you likely look more attractive then his ego can cope with. I bet you’re better than him, basically, and he’s painfully aware of that.
Who made him the fashion police anyway?! 😉

[Mellow]

I know wouldn’t mind but he’s no Prince Charming looks wise think faded out and going bobbly all his wardrobe what is nice I bought

[Author]

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